Some people think we should do more to prevent crimes, while others believe that we can do little for this problem. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
In the contemporary era,
crime
rates have increased rapidly in comparison with the previous years.Many individuals argue that it is our responsibility to prevent illegal Use synonyms
activities
,Use synonyms
whereas
a few groups of Linking Words
people
say we can not contribute much towards the prevention of Use synonyms
crime
.In my opinion,I agree with the former view,because awareness and protection are responsibilities of everyone, I will discuss both viewpoints in the upcoming paragraphs.
On the one hand,some Use synonyms
people
believe that reducing the Use synonyms
crime
rate is everyone's duty and I agree with them.Use synonyms
Firstly
, awareness camps are run by the government,but very few Linking Words
people
are participating with them,Use synonyms
therefore
,the success rate of Linking Words
this
strategy is very low. If the majority of the population is involved,there will be significant positive outcomes.Linking Words
For example
,Linking Words
according to
a recent survey,there is the least population participating from the rural areas in awareness programs.Another reason is not following the guidelines of the authorities.There are lots of illegal Linking Words
activities
reported,because of not obeying the rules and regulations Use synonyms
such
as drink and driving,overspeeding and misuse of the internet.
Linking Words
On the other hand
,other Linking Words
people
stated that we cannot help more to stop criminal Use synonyms
activities
.First and foremost, it is all up to the higher authorities to tackle Use synonyms
this
situation.To elaborate, the government bodies should take strict actions against the Linking Words
people
,who are breaking the rules ,so others can learn from that. Use synonyms
Furthermore
, schools and universities may put more focus on educating young students,because they are the main culprits, who are largely part of these Linking Words
crime
reports.Use synonyms
For instance
,Linking Words
according to
one police survey, 30-35% of youngsters are involved in criminal events every year.
In conclusion,though a few Linking Words
people
believe that it is all the responsibility of the authorities,I feel that Use synonyms
it
is combined approach from every citizen and the government will help to reduce illegal Correct pronoun usage
apply
activities
as soon as possible.Use synonyms
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task achievement
You have effectively addressed the essay prompt by discussing both views and giving your opinion. However, you could expand a bit more on both perspectives for a more comprehensive response.
coherence
While the essay is generally clear, there are moments where connecting ideas within a paragraph could be smoother. Ensure that each idea flows logically into the next.
general
Make sure to proofread for minor grammatical errors and punctuation, such as unnecessary commas and missing spaces after punctuation marks.
coherence
Your introduction and conclusion are clearly present, providing a good framework for your essay.
task achievement
You provide relevant and specific examples to support your main points, such as the survey about rural participation in awareness programs.