Some parents and teachers think that children’s behavior should be strictly controlled. While some think that children should be free to behave. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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In the modern era, there are certain laws to protect infants from being abused by parents.

However

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, it is argued that whether youngsters should be allowed to behave freely or not. In

this

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essay, I will justify both sides with my reasons and mention my perspective in the upcoming paragraphs.

To begin

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with, the first and foremost reason behind the thought of controlling children's behaviour in a strict way is that the youth is the future of every country.

For instance

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, if parents and mentors do not control young ones

then

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there will be chances of choosing the wrong paths in their lives

whereas

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when their elders teach them about good things and control them when they do anything wrong

then

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they will learn some amazing things in their lives.

As a result

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, since little ones are strictly controlled to behave well with others, the rate of crime may be decreased.

However

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, the latter statement of people is saying that kids should be free to behave.

This

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is because kids can learn more from experience rather than being forced into something.

For example

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, when youngsters are free to choose their preferred subject

then

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, there are more chances of achieving success because

that is

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their favourite course. In fact, they would dedicate more time to study.

Similarly

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, when they are free to behave, they would learn what are the consequences of behaving badly with others.

Therefore

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, little one can learn lessons from that thing. In conclusion,

although

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controlling the behaviour of adolescents is necessary, young ones learn more quickly when it is their choice to behave. In my opinion, I would rather deny the fact that offspring should be controlled as it would not give them opportunities to experience life lessons by themselves.

simranjot0002Fri May 10 2024

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Task Achievement

Try to provide more specific examples to support your points more convincingly. While your essay addresses both views and includes your opinion, integrating real-world examples or studies can add depth to your argument.

Coherence and Cohesion

Make sure each paragraph has a clear main idea and that all sentences in that paragraph support the main idea. This helps in making your argument more coherent and easy to follow.

Coherence and Cohesion

Work on varying your sentence structures more effectively. Using a mix of complex and compound sentences can make your writing more engaging and show off your language skills.

Task Achievement

You effectively discussed both views and clearly stated your own opinion, fulfilling the essay prompt.

Coherence and Cohesion

You provided a logical structure by organizing your essay into an introduction, body paragraphs discussing both views, and a conclusion, which aids in the reader's understanding.

12
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

292 words

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Some parents and teachers think that children’s behavior should be strictly controlled. While some think that children should be free to behave. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

In schools and universities, girls tend to choose arts, while boys like science. what are the reasons for this trend and do you think this tendency should be changed?

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Mobile phones and the Internet could have many benefits for old people. However, this age group uses technology the least. What are the benefits for old people of using mobile phones and the Internet? How can we encourage them to use this new