Some people say that what individuals do to protect the environment cannot make difference, others say that individuals can protect the environment. Discuss both of these views and give your opinion.

Whether or not
individuals
can do anything to ensure the
environment
stays safe is a controversial discussion point.
While
some people say that if everyone takes action, drastic changes will take place, opponents
such
as
this
writer believe that what an individual does has little effect on the
environment
and only the
government
is able to help improve the situation. First of all, it is a fact that an individual can hardly change anything with regard to the
environment
.
This
is
due to
the case when one person makes an
effort
and it is likely to be obscured in the environmental destruction that takes place around the world.
Additionally
, as no immediate effects can be seen from their
effort
, it is hard for
individuals
to continue with their
work
. The European Environmental Agency (EEA) recently published data regarding recycling, and it has been shown that in Europe, only 3 out of 10 people recycle their trash responsibly.
However
, some argue that the efforts of
individuals
do indeed matter. Their point states that if the world is going to fight pollution issues
then
it needs to involve the
individuals
’ efforts. They
also
say that if everyone does manage to put in some
work
to ensure the safety of the
environment
then
it will cause positive changes to occur.
While
their point is valid in some parts, a coordinated and planned
effort
will need to happen to be effective in dealing with pollution or climate change.
Therefore
, it is the writer’s opinion that it is the
government
that will be the one to make
individuals
’ efforts worth it.
This
is mostly
due to
the fact that most environmental problems are as vast and hard to solve as they are detrimental.
Thus
,
individuals
can
work
with the
government
to plan a change in attitudes and actions taken by people worldwide to be effective in dealing with these issues.
For example
, the EEA suggests that the European governments can host schemes related to reducing car usage in order to reduce air pollution. In conclusion,
although
individuals
work
can create positive trends in environmental issues, it is quite useless when done on their own and better requires the assistance of the
government
worldwide to increase effectiveness.
Hence
, it is suggested by
this
author that personal
effort
to improve the
environment
will not do much.
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task achievement
To improve your task response, try including more specific examples and detailed evidence to support your arguments. This will make your essay more convincing and comprehensive.
coherence cohesion
Focus on making your transitions between paragraphs smoother. Use linking words and phrases to ensure a seamless flow from one idea to another. This can enhance the logical structure of your essay.
task achievement
Work on balancing the discussion more evenly between the two viewpoints before presenting your opinion. This will give a clearer picture of both perspectives and reinforce the depth of your analysis.
structure
Your essay has a well-structured introduction and conclusion, which clearly present your main argument and summarize your points effectively.
task achievement
You have presented clear and comprehensive ideas that address both sides of the argument. This demonstrates your ability to discuss complex issues thoughtfully.
coherence cohesion
Main points are supported with relevant statistics and examples, enhancing the credibility and depth of your argument. This is a strong aspect of your essay.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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