Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

When people function together in communities, they usually interact in ways that affect the status of their environment. In communities where the population coexists peacefully, society tends to thrive.

However

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, with numerous people living together, issues

such

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as constant comparisons are bound to arise. The public holds diverse opinions regarding

this

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matter. Some argue that contest among members of society brings out the best in each individual.

Moreover

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, they believe it can serve as a strong motivation for people to improve themselves and strive for higher achievements.

For instance

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, a 2021 study by the University of Cambridge revealed that workplaces with moderate contesting reported a 15% increase in employee productivity.

Conversely

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, others assert that institutions

such

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as schools and workplaces built on teamwork rather than rivalry tend to grow more effectively.

This

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is because students and coworkers are inclined to assist their peers,

thus

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enhancing

overall

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performance.

According to

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educational statistics published in 2022, pupils involved in collaborative projects improved their academic scores by nearly 20%. I am convinced that for society to progress, a delicate balance between rivalry and cooperation is necessary. Schools that focus solely on turning every activity into a contest often foster resentment and envy, which may eventually lead to division and failure.

On the other hand

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, in the absence of suitable challenges, students may become negligent and complacent.

Therefore

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, educational institutions should design programs that encourage healthy competition

while

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simultaneously promoting teamwork and mutual support. All things considered,

while

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rivalry may be viewed as a primitive instinct in human groups, implementing fair regulations and guaranteeing equal opportunities can successfully channel it into a desirable and productive aspect of social development.

fatima.alblwi95

Jul 29, 2025

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task achievement

Your introduction is clear and presents the topic well. However, try to add a few sentences about why this discussion is important. This can strengthen your introduction.

task achievement

In the body paragraphs, make sure to explain your examples more. For instance, how did the 2021 study impact the workplace? More details will make your points stronger.

coherence and cohesion

The structure of your essay is clear, but ensure that each paragraph has a clear main idea. Each sentence should connect well to this main idea to improve the flow.

coherence and cohesion

Your conclusion restates the main points nicely. Try to add a call to action or a final thought to leave a stronger impression on the reader.

task achievement

You have given strong examples to support your views, especially the studies which add credibility to your points.

task achievement

Your opinion is clearly stated in the essay, and your argument shows good understanding of both sides of the topic.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

275 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

innovation
productivity
excel
outperform
advancements
academic standards
work ethic
stress
anxiety
unhealthy rivalries
harmonious
supportive
collaborative learning
social skills
communication skills
sense of community
collective goals

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Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Nowadays many elderly people are living alone and this can cause a variety of problems. What are some of these problems, and what solutions can you suggest?

Many people think that the fast food industry is responsible for health problems in society, while others believe that individuals are responsible for their own health. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people think that it is good for a country's culture to import foreign movies and TV programmes. Others think that it is better to produce these locally. Discuss both views and give your opinion

Many developed countries are helping poor countries in the world.Some people insist financial aid cannot boost their economy alone.To what extent do you agree with this statement.

News stories on TV and in newspapers are very often accompanied by pictures. Some people say that these pictures are more effective than words. What is your opinion about this?