Some people say in order to prevent illness and disease, governments should focus on reducing environmental pollution and housing problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #illness #disease #governments #focus #pollution

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

Many residents have an idea that to prevent illness and disease, environmental pollution and housing problems should be reduced by the government.

This

Linking Words

writer completely agrees with that opinion. It can be seen that pollution brings a lot of viruses with it. The virus can survive for a long time in the air and it will be spread out by the winds to attack in a big range. The amount of viruses in the air can be decreased if the environmental pollutions are decreased too. According the information from medical scientists, the show figures that the number of patients who have been sick by the virus in the air has risen strongly in recent years.

Therefore

Linking Words

, the government should focus on how to reduce environmental pollution in their cities.

Moreover

Linking Words

, having a clean environment

also

Linking Words

makes the emotions of the citizens better. Lots of research shows that many people will be happier if the environment surrounding them is clean and fresh, these conditions can improve the work quality of citizens.

Therefore

Linking Words

the economy of the country will improve a lot. It can be easy to see that many governments in the world try to support their inhabitants to have a better working atmosphere and these things result in their own company having the best place in the world. In conclusion, governments have an important part of the countries to improve the economy by helping their citizens to have a better working environment.

Tue Jun 04 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement

Your essay should include more specific examples to support your arguments. For instance, you could mention specific diseases linked to pollution or housing problems.

task achievement

Work on extending your points with more comprehensive details. Explain how reducing pollution directly correlates with disease prevention.

coherence cohesion

While your introduction and conclusion are present, ensure they are as strong as possible by clearly summarizing your main points and restating your position.

coherence cohesion

Consider dividing your essay into clearer paragraphs, each focusing on a single main idea. This will make your logical structure more evident.

coherence cohesion

You should pay attention to connecting your ideas more smoothly with cohesive devices (linking words/phrases) to enhance the flow of your essay.

task achievement

Your position on the topic is very clear and you have decisively agreed with the statement, which is a strong quality of your response.

coherence cohesion

The introduction and conclusion provide a clear framework for your essay, which helps in understanding your overall position.

coherence cohesion

Your arguments are relevant to the topic and provide a logical sequence of reasoning for your standpoint.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

4
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

242 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

preventive healthcare
environmental regulations
respiratory diseases
public health policies
sanitation facilities
urban planning
communicable diseases
socio-economic factors
sustainable development
government intervention
healthcare infrastructure
industrial emissions
air quality index
affordable housing
mental wellbeing

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

4.5
band
Some companies sponsor sport and sport star as a way to advertise themselves. Some people think it is good while others think there are disadvantages. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Nowadays , many companies followed new manner to show their products and services by supporting athltes or sport to present in public. In fact , two side of this event gain their goals. I agree with this methodes. But , we have to consider the positive and negative sides.
6.5
band
Many museums and historical sites are mainly visited by tourists but not local people. Why is this the case? What can be done to attract more local people to these museums?
It is widely argued that museums and historical sites have been considered tourist destinations for travelers rather than local citizens. This essay attempts to shed light on the driving factors behind this problem before outlining several viable solutions that should be adopted to tackle it.
5
band
You have recently moved to a new neighborhood. Write a letter to a friend about your new neighborhood. In your letter: Describe the new neighborhood Explain why you moved there Talk about your neighbors Write at least 150 words. Begin your letter as follows:
I hope this letter finds ypu well.
7
band
Some people say that the academic success of students depends on the quality of their teachers. Others think it depends on the personal commitment and attitude of the students. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
It is always a moot issue whether the academic efficacy of students relies on teachers’ abilities or on their own iron determination and behaviour. Some people assert that it depends upon the teachers due to their qualifications and expertise in teaching whereas others advocate that it builds upon the table studies and dedicated schedule of students. This essay will delve deeper into these viewpoints and culminate my opinion in the conclusion.
5.5
band
In certain countries, the number of people who use bicycles as the main means of transport is reducing even though it is beneficial both physically and environmentally. What can be the reasons for this change in preference? How can people be encouraged to use bicycles?
People in some specific tribes state that although bicycling is the primary way of transportation as it not only brings benefits to human health but also alleviates pollution in the environment, yet witnessing a gradual drop in the proportion of people using it. Despite the gigantic damage that motorized vehicles bring about, they are still favoured by many people as they encompass certain merits. This essay will explore the rooted reasons for this shift and present some plausible solutions that can be implemented to reduce these recent occurrences.

Some people say in order to prevent illness and disease, governments should focus on reducing environmental pollution and housing problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

Some companies sponsor sport and sport star as a way to advertise themselves. Some people think it is good while others think there are disadvantages. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Many museums and historical sites are mainly visited by tourists but not local people. Why is this the case? What can be done to attract more local people to these museums?

You have recently moved to a new neighborhood. Write a letter to a friend about your new neighborhood. In your letter: Describe the new neighborhood Explain why you moved there Talk about your neighbors Write at least 150 words. Begin your letter as follows:

Some people say that the academic success of students depends on the quality of their teachers. Others think it depends on the personal commitment and attitude of the students. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

In certain countries, the number of people who use bicycles as the main means of transport is reducing even though it is beneficial both physically and environmentally. What can be the reasons for this change in preference? How can people be encouraged to use bicycles?