The graph below give in formation about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040

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The provided graph illustrates a comparative analysis of the rate of urbanization in four Asian countries: Malaysia,

Indonesia

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, The

Phillippines

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, and

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Thiland

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Thailand

from 1970 to 2020

along with

Linking Words

a 20-year look into the future at 10-year intervals. A broad view of the graph shows all countries experience an upward trend throughout the graph

In addition

Linking Words

to the fact that Malaysia is expected to be the lead in 2040 followed by

Indonesia

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, The

Phillippines

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, and

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Thiland

Correct your spelling

Thailand

. A closer look into the details regarding

predicted

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the predicted

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leading region in 2040 reveals that Malaysia has experienced steady growth over the years Starting from 30% in 1970 and reaching a double in 2000 and increasing to 70% in 2022 which is expected to stand at 85% in 2024.

Indonesia

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however

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, went through a more dramatic change, beginning at a low of well under 20% , surpassing

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Thiland

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Thailand

and the

Phillippines

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in 2000 and 2010 at roughly 30% and 40% respectively.

Indonesia

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is predicted to reach 60% in 2040. Turning to the remaining states, a relatively parallel pattern of growth is visible between The

Phillippines

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and

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Thiland

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Thailand

with the former going through some additional fluctuations from 1980 to 2000. There is,

also

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, a constant gap of 10 per cent

seen

Verb problem

apply

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which is predicted to reduce in the future. It is notable that The

Phillippines

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had a peak of 50% in 1990 and

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Thiland

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Thailand

is projected to reach a high of above 40% in 2040.

Submitted by TUTOO on Tue Jun 04 2024

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Basic structure: Use less body paragraphs.

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Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words indonesia, phillippines, thiland with synonyms.

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Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 3 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "growth" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "reach" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.

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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.

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4
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

8 paragraphs

240 words

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The graph below give in formation about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040

Many young people regularly change their jobs over the years. What are the reasons for this? Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

the grap below shows in percentage terms the changing patterns of domestic access to modern technology in homes in the UK summerise the informatio by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons were relavant.

Some people think that teachers are no longer needed because students can study via the Internet. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

As computers translate quickly and accurately, learning foreign languages is a waste of time. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In order to solve traffic problems, governments should tax private car owners heavily and use their money to improve public transportation. What are the advantages and disadvantages of such a solution