In some countries, the number of people who visits art gallery is declining. What are the reasons for this? How can we solve this problem?

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Galleries are becoming increasingly unpopular in many nations, and it is an apparent trend that people are becoming less interested in
arts
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recently, there are several causative factors to
this
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phenomenon ranging from individual to societal levels. In
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essay, I will explain them and propose the most appropriate solutions. One of the first reasons for
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problem is digital addiction, people are tied to their phones most of the time and are not willing to explore outdoor activities. The second is the lack of awareness about the importance of
arts
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in educational institutions.
For instance
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, in a study conducted by Oxford University, the researchers surveyed a group of high school students about their artistic inclinations, and 82% of them agreed that
art
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is a waste of time and that they would rather spend that time doing sports or video games.
Lastly
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, the lack of funds for
art
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galleries may make them a boring place to visit. Regarding solutions, the most important factor is encouraging governments to pay more support to the
arts
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sector, both financially aiding the galleries, and via hunting for talent in national
arts
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competitions.
Secondly
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, schools must
instill
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instil
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a passion for
arts
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among youngsters,
for example
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, by organizing frequent trips to
art
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spaces accompanied by a clear explanation of its impact to draw inspiration.
Lastly
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,
art
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organizers should boost their social media presence and enable some virtual reality features to draw digitally persistent people to them. In conclusion, addressing the multiple levels of
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problem can help in creating targeted interventions that will awaken the artistic spirit of
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generation and push them to be more frequent visitors of
art
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gallaries
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galleries
.
Submitted by maryamansour11 on

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task achievement
Consider adding more specific examples and data to strengthen your arguments. Providing detailed examples can make your points more compelling.
coherence cohesion
Ensure each paragraph connects smoothly to the next one. Although your essay is mostly well-structured, pay attention to transitions between ideas to maintain a seamless flow.
task achievement
Clarify some of your arguments by elaborating further on how government support and school initiatives can effectively address the decline in art gallery visits.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear and logical structure, making it easy to follow.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are well-presented, clearly outlining the problem and summarizing the proposed solutions.
task achievement
You have identified several key reasons for the decline in art gallery visits and suggested relevant solutions, showing a good understanding of the topic.

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