It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages?

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Risk-taking is a crucial part of human lives. People should take some
risks
not only in their professional lives but
also
in their personal lives. From my point of view,
while
some
risks
may lead to failure, the
overall
upsides of it far outweigh its downsides. On the one hand, risk-takers might encounter some short-term difficulties.
For instance
, when individuals who are not satisfied with their salaries leave their jobs, for a short time they will be without income which is annoying, but
this
situation is not permanent and they will find a new job vacancy.
Also
, uncalculated
risks
could be a waste of time and money.
For example
, in Iran, some residents invested a large amount of money in the cryptocurrency market without enough knowledge in
this
field, resulting in losing savings.
However
, taking
risks
usually provides opportunities. History is full of successful and well-known ones who took
risks
and stepped out of their comfort zones to pursue their dreams.
For example
, if Elon Musk continued working as a simple employee, today he was not a famous businessperson not only throughout the world but
also
in his
neighborhood
Change the spelling
neighbourhood
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.
Risks
can teach people something new because the more they take
risks
, the more they become experienced.
For example
, when students make a decisive decision to leave their families or countries by embracing a lot of
risks
, they can become familiar with enormous circumstances and learn independence. In conclusion,
although
there are some drawbacks associated with risk-taking, I am of the opinion that the plus points of that action, as long as they are calculated, are more significant because they can open up new opportunities and insight, leading to a bright future.
Submitted by TUTOO on

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task achievement
Your essay provides relevant arguments and examples, but ensure that each paragraph directly supports your main point and develops ideas fully. This will strengthen your argument and make it more persuasive.
coherence and cohesion
Focus on linking your ideas more smoothly. Some transitions could be improved to ensure a more seamless flow between paragraphs and ideas. This will enhance the overall coherence of your essay.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear structure with a strong introduction and conclusion, contributing to a coherent overall narrative.
task achievement
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task achievement
Your ideas are clear and concise, making it easy to follow your argument and understand your perspective.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Opportunities
  • Growth
  • Innovation
  • Challenges
  • Self-discovery
  • Resilience
  • Uncertainty
  • Consequences
  • Calculated risks
  • Stagnation
  • Regret
  • Comfort zone
  • Entrepreneurship
  • Adventurous spirit
  • Thriving
  • Failure
  • Mitigate
  • Reap the rewards
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