There is a lot of pressure on young people today to succeed academically. As a result, some people believe that non-academic subjects, such as physical education and cookery, should be removed from the school syllabus so that children can concentrate on academic work. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

The increasing academic pressure on young
people
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has led some to propose eliminating non-academic
subjects
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from school curricula to allow greater focus on traditional
subjects
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.
While
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I understand the reasoning behind
this
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suggestion, I strongly disagree with removing physical
education
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and practical
subjects
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like cookery, as they provide essential benefits that purely academic
education
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cannot offer. The primary reason for maintaining non-academic
subjects
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is their crucial role in promoting physical and mental health. Physical
education
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helps combat the growing childhood obesity epidemic and establishes lifelong fitness habits. Regular exercise has been scientifically proven to improve concentration, reduce stress hormones, and enhance cognitive function—all of which actually support academic performance. Countries like Finland, which maintain balanced curricula including arts and sports, consistently achieve top rankings in international educational assessments
while
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producing well-rounded citizens.
Furthermore
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, practical
subjects
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like cookery teach invaluable life skills that academic
subjects
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cannot provide. Learning to prepare nutritious meals develops independence, budgeting skills, and
understanding
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an understanding
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of healthy living. These abilities become increasingly important as young
people
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transition to adulthood.
Additionally
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, creative and practical
subjects
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offer alternative pathways for students who may struggle with traditional academic
subjects
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but excel in hands-on learning environments.
While
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supporters of curriculum reduction argue that additional academic time would improve test scores and university preparation,
this
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narrow focus ignores the broader purpose of
education
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. Schools should develop complete individuals, not just academic performers. The current mental health crisis among young
people
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suggests that increasing academic pressure without providing outlets for stress relief and creative expression would be counterproductive. In conclusion, removing non-academic
subjects
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would deprive students of essential physical, practical, and emotional development opportunities. Rather than eliminating these
subjects
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, educational systems should strive to maintain balanced curricula that prepare young
people
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for successful, healthy, and fulfilling lives beyond academic achievement.

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coherence and cohesion
Make sure each paragraph has a clear main idea. Some points could be clearer if you used more linking words.
task achievement
Include specific examples to support your ideas where possible, like more details around the benefits of cookery or specific life skills.
task achievement
You clearly stated your opinion in the introduction and concluded well, reinforcing your main idea.
task achievement
You presented strong arguments for the importance of non-academic subjects, making good use of examples.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • pressure
  • succeed
  • academically
  • non-academic
  • physical education
  • cookery
  • school syllabus
  • concentrate
  • academic work
  • well-rounded
  • enhancement
  • practical skills
  • balanced education system
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