It is a commonly held belief that the death penalty is a good deterrent to prevent heinous crimes. However, others believe that life long sentence is a better deterrent. Discuss both views

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People often believe that the

death

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penalty

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is effective in preventing serious

crimes

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while

Linking Words

others think the life-long sentence is more likely to discourage potential offenders from committing illegal acts. I partially agree with the latter, for more severe experiences they would have to make amends for their sins regardless of the

death

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penalty

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being an extreme form of punishment. On the one hand, the

death

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penalty

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has an incredible effect in deterring horrible wrongdoings since many suspects will be afraid of being killed by the authorities without their intentions.

In other words

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, the growing sense of horror toward the intense punishments

such

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as hanging and electric shock encouraged them to stop terrible murders and other evil

crimes

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Moreover

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, many suspects will regret that their future dreams and goals in future still remain unaccomplished when their life is forcefully terminated, which makes it less likely for them to commit horrible

crimes

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For instance

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, the number of serious

crimes

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has dropped dramatically in the United States since it introduced the

death

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penalty

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Therefore

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, more potential offenders are likely to reconsider their acts to avoid the harsh consequences before it is too late.

On the other hand

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, the life-long sentence will lead to a declining number of severe

crimes

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as culprits experience the intense restrictions of their freedom in prison. Indeed, as they are forced to spend long periods of time in locked cells, being heavily guarded by the authorities, they often suffer from an intense level of stress.

Consequently

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, some prisoners even have deteriorating mental conditions as they are not allowed to go out to meet their friends and family.

Furthermore

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, spending a prolonged time in a locked space can damage their health

due to

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the constant lack of exercise and access to sufficient medical care.

Thus

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, the acknowledgement that they cannot be freed for good makes it even more difficult for them to accept the harsh consequences of their wrongdoings. In conclusion, I somewhat agree that the life-long sentence is more effective in preventing terrible

crimes

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since many criminals do not want to lose their freedom.

However

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, the

death

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penalty

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can

also

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reduce the number of serious

crimes

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because of the unimaginable fear of the way of their dying.

mizuhoThu Jun 06 2024

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task achievement

To strengthen the task response, ensure that both views are discussed equally in-depth. Expand on the arguments for a life-long sentence to match the detail provided for the death penalty.

task achievement

Ensure that your arguments are consistently supported by specific examples. Including more concrete examples can make the discussion more compelling.

coherence cohesion

For improved coherence and cohesion, use more transitional phrases to smoothly connect your ideas and paragraphs.

coherence cohesion

Consider providing a clearer outline of the essay structure in your introduction to guide the reader through your arguments.

coherence cohesion

The introduction and conclusion are clearly presented, providing a good framework for your discussion.

task achievement

Your ideas are clear and generally well-expressed, making your main points easy to understand.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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13
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

369 words

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It is a commonly held belief that the death penalty is a good deterrent to prevent heinous crimes. However, others believe that life long sentence is a better deterrent. Discuss both views

Your opinion

Many people leave the countryside for the greater opportunities which are offered by cities. This move is not without disadvantages for both people and the environment. What are some benefits and drawbacks of urbanization?

Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Today, some young people say that their mobile phones are the most important thing they own. Do you think that the popularity of mobile phones is a good or bad thing?

One of the most important issues facing the world today is a shortage of food and some think genetically modified food is a possible solution. To what extent do you agree or disagree?