It is a commonly held belief that the death penalty is a good deterrent to prevent heinous crimes. However, others believe that life long sentence is a better deterrent. Discuss both views

People often believe that the
death
penalty
is effective in preventing serious
crimes
while
others think the life-long sentence is more likely to discourage potential offenders from committing illegal acts. I partially agree with the latter, for more severe experiences they would have to make amends for their sins regardless of the
death
penalty
being an extreme form of punishment. On the one hand, the
death
penalty
has an incredible effect in deterring horrible wrongdoings since many suspects will be afraid of being killed by the authorities without their intentions.
In other words
, the growing sense of horror toward the intense punishments
such
as hanging and electric shock encouraged them to stop terrible murders and other evil
crimes
.
Moreover
, many suspects will regret that their future dreams and goals in future still remain unaccomplished when their life is forcefully terminated, which makes it less likely for them to commit horrible
crimes
.
For instance
, the number of serious
crimes
has dropped dramatically in the United States since it introduced the
death
penalty
.
Therefore
, more potential offenders are likely to reconsider their acts to avoid the harsh consequences before it is too late.
On the other hand
, the life-long sentence will lead to a declining number of severe
crimes
as culprits experience the intense restrictions of their freedom in prison. Indeed, as they are forced to spend long periods of time in locked cells, being heavily guarded by the authorities, they often suffer from an intense level of stress.
Consequently
, some prisoners even have deteriorating mental conditions as they are not allowed to go out to meet their friends and family.
Furthermore
, spending a prolonged time in a locked space can damage their health
due to
the constant lack of exercise and access to sufficient medical care.
Thus
, the acknowledgement that they cannot be freed for good makes it even more difficult for them to accept the harsh consequences of their wrongdoings. In conclusion, I somewhat agree that the life-long sentence is more effective in preventing terrible
crimes
since many criminals do not want to lose their freedom.
However
, the
death
penalty
can
also
reduce the number of serious
crimes
because of the unimaginable fear of the way of their dying.
Submitted by mizuho on

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task achievement
To strengthen the task response, ensure that both views are discussed equally in-depth. Expand on the arguments for a life-long sentence to match the detail provided for the death penalty.
task achievement
Ensure that your arguments are consistently supported by specific examples. Including more concrete examples can make the discussion more compelling.
coherence cohesion
For improved coherence and cohesion, use more transitional phrases to smoothly connect your ideas and paragraphs.
coherence cohesion
Consider providing a clearer outline of the essay structure in your introduction to guide the reader through your arguments.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are clearly presented, providing a good framework for your discussion.
task achievement
Your ideas are clear and generally well-expressed, making your main points easy to understand.

Your opinion

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