It is common aspiration among many young people to run their own business, rather than work for an employer. Do you think the advantages of working for yourself outweigh the drawbacks?
These days, it is a common aim of many people leaving university to try to start up their own
company
. They believe that running a business
has many advantages over working for someone else, such
as the freedom to make your own decisions
. I agree with this
point of view, but it is important to bear in mind that running a business
does not suit everybody.
There are several benefits of setting up your own business
. For me, the main one is that you have room to be creative. Instead
of having to follow your employer's decisions
, you can set the goals for the business
yourself, which means that you feel more in control. This
generally results in people feeling happier in their jobs.
Not only that, you can also
keep the profits if the company
is successful. If all goes well, you will earn far more than if you work for someone else. For instance
, if you set up your own graphic design company
, and you build a good reputation, you will be able to make substantial profits. You will therefore
be more motivated to work hard, in order to make a success of your company
.
Having said that, it is undeniable that running a business
is risky. If there is an economic downturn, or you make mistakes in your business
decisions
, your company
can go bust, which can mean that you lose everything and you have to lay off your staff. Moreover
, it is very hard to switch off at weekends, because the business
is always in the back of your mind.
To sum up
, although
there is no doubt there are some risks associated with running your own business
, I believe the benefits outweigh the drawbacks, particularly with regard to making decisions
. However
, it should be said that not everyone is a risk-taker, and some prefer to work for someone else.Submitted by Nghỉ hè vui vẻ cả nhà on
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relevant specific examples
Your essay is very well-structured, but try to include more specific examples to support your points. This will make your arguments stronger and more convincing.
logical structure
Ensure that each paragraph focuses clearly on one main idea. Although your ideas are well-organized, occasionally there is a mix of points (e.g., creativity and happiness in the same paragraph).
introduction conclusion present
Excellent introduction and conclusion that clearly lay out and sum up your argument.
complete response
You have addressed the task very thoroughly, emphasizing both benefits and drawbacks of running a business compared to working for an employer.
logical structure
Your essay is easy to read and logically structured, making it a pleasure to follow your argument.
supported main points
Your main points are well supported, making your argument persuasive overall.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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