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Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

some people think that it is good for a country’s culture to import foreign movies and TV programmes. Others think that it is better to produce these locally. Discuss both views and give your opinion

#people #country’s #culture #import #movies #tv #programmes
It is controversial whether foreign
movies
 benefit a country's culture and we should import them or whether it is better to produce them locally.
This
 writer will discuss how overseas
movies
 bring fun and excitement to the nation, how they cause cultural erosion and why foreign
films
 can be used as a learning documentary to improve the country. First of all, it cannot be denied that foreign
movies
 like Hollywood
films
 contain a lot of entertaining and relaxing factors. Their
movies
 are usually produced with a
big
Correct word choice
large
show examples
 amount of money invested into the process, especially the settings and special effects. Eventually, viewers will be amazed and attracted by all the fantastic scenes in
films
, making them think that imaginary things in
films
 are real and have to be somewhere in
this
 world or in the future.
Furthermore
, if those
films
 have gripping plots, they
definitely
Add a missing verb
are definitely
show examples
 masterpieces.
For instance
, the Avatar film, the Spirited Away film and so on.
On the other hand
, importing foreign
movies
 can lead to the future when we will forget and abandon our national cultures or customs.
This
 happens because children in the modern era tend to ignore their local history and learn foreign customs.
That is
 why some people think that , unlike overseas
films
, they should teach children about history and culture through their own
films
, they have more advantages than those from other countries.
Although
this
 is a good reason
this
 writer follows the former opinion that foreign
movies
 have their own advantages that we can use. To make it clear, countries can use foreign
films
 as teaching resources to analyse and learn how to make special effects or where to take a perfect shot in order to develop their film's quality.
Moreover
,
movies
 teach us about other countries to bridge the gap between nations.
To sum up
, foreign
movies
 can be used not just to entertain but
also
 as good resources for learning and training.
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coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear central idea. For instance, combine and elaborate on your points about cultural erosion into one comprehensive paragraph to create a stronger argument.
coherence cohesion
Make sure the conclusion not only sums up the essay but also briefly restates the main points discussed. This will help in solidifying your argument.
task achievement
Develop your ideas more fully with additional details and explanations. For example, you could further discuss the advantages of using foreign films as educational tools.
task achievement
You have addressed both sides of the argument well and provided a clear opinion, fulfilling the requirements of the task.
task achievement
Good use of relevant examples like 'Avatar' and 'Spirited Away' to support your points, making your arguments more concrete.
coherence cohesion
Overall, well-organized paragraphs with clear transitions from one idea to the next.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • cultural diversity
  • foreign films
  • TV series
  • exposure
  • cross-cultural understanding
  • stimulate creativity
  • inspire
  • local productions
  • cultural heritage
  • employment opportunities
  • contribute to the economy
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