With growing number of populations in cities, many people are living in small homes that don't have outdoor spaces. Is this a positive or negative development.
In present times, there is an increase in population within cities, which results in smaller accommodations for
people
, and the houses are so small that they do not have external Use synonyms
spaces
. The author of Use synonyms
this
essay believes that Linking Words
this
alteration will have detrimental effects on their behaviour Linking Words
as well as
their social relationships.
Linking Words
To begin
with, it should be acknowledged that houses play a significant role in improving Linking Words
people
’s mood. Since modern life is becoming busier and more stressful, Use synonyms
people
have a much more desperate desire to feel better when they arrive home. Use synonyms
Besides
the arrangement of the house internally, the outdoor Linking Words
spaces
are Use synonyms
also
important because Linking Words
this
is the place where Linking Words
people
can enjoy fresh air, which will eventually pump out bad emotions and negative thoughts. Use synonyms
Consequently
, Linking Words
people
will feel happier and more optimistic about their lives, and Use synonyms
this
behaviour will provide them with motivation Linking Words
as well as
ideas for their work or group projects. Linking Words
To sum up
, the house will be very dull and gloomy without outdoor Linking Words
spaces
and Use synonyms
this
will aggravate their mental health and Linking Words
then
their physical health.
Another point that needs to be considered is that external Linking Words
spaces
cannot just possibly bridge the gap between neighbourhoods but Use synonyms
also
strike new friendships. With outdoor Linking Words
spaces
, Use synonyms
people
can celebrate parties like a BBQ, Use synonyms
this
is the time when Linking Words
people
can put their tasks aside and have enjoyable moments with their neighbours. Use synonyms
Furthermore
, Linking Words
people
usually do not come to a party alone, they will often invite their friends to come. Use synonyms
As a result
, their neighbours can meet and chat with their friends, which can be classmates or colleagues, and Linking Words
this
results in a wider connection between Linking Words
people
. To summarize, their life might be isolated without these open Use synonyms
spaces
and Use synonyms
this
will trigger depression and lack of social skills, which will transform into major obstacles in their life later on.
In conclusion, Linking Words
this
writer holds the view that modern houses should have an open space, Linking Words
although
it might not be big, but enough to reduce to stifling atmosphere within the house. Linking Words
This
essay has enough pieces of evidence to prove the author’s point of view.Linking Words
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task achievement
To strengthen the task response, it would be beneficial to include more relevant and specific examples that align with the main points discussed.
coherence cohesion
While the logical structure of the essay is generally clear, ensure that each paragraph is cohesively connected to the next with clear transitions.
coherence cohesion
Supporting the main points with additional evidence or examples can further enhance the coherence and cohesion of the essay.
introduction conclusion
The introduction effectively sets up the essay’s argument and the conclusion succinctly summarizes the main points.
task achievement
The essay provides a comprehensive response to the task by discussing both behavioral and social impacts of living in small homes without outdoor spaces.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example