It is more important for school children to learn about local history than world history. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#school #children #history #world

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There has been a lively debate about whether the

history

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curriculum should place emphasis on local

history

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rather than international

history

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. From my perspective, I disagree with

this

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view. On the one hand, it is undeniable that fostering national pride and identity in young children is of utmost significance.

Therefore

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, the role of national

history

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lessons should not be ignored as

such

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lessons can cultivate a profound sense of patriotism and national pride in young

students

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For example

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, if Vietnamese children are given lessons about how valiantly their ancestors fought for the freedom of their motherland, they are likely to become more patriotic and be willing to devote themselves to the country’s development when they grow up.

Nevertheless

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, I believe it would be unwise to focus solely on domestic

history

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First,

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a comprehensive study of world

history

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can enable young learners to gain a deeper and more nuanced understanding of their country's

history

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, rather than developing a superficial and myopic perspective.

For instance

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, if Vietnamese

students

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are taught about the geopolitical and international factors that have influenced Vietnam's

history

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, they will acquire a more balanced and nuanced interpretation of their country's past.

Furthermore

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, having a good grasp of other nations' histories can

also

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help children learn to be more tolerant and embrace differences in cultures, religions, and political systems between countries.

This

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not only benefits

students

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' career prospects when working in multinational environments but

also

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contributes to the

overall

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harmony of the world. In conclusion, it is paramount that educators integrate both local and global

history

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to help

students

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develop a rich and multifaceted understanding of their country

as well as

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the world.

Submitted by weezel on Mon Jun 10 2024

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task achievement

While the essay provides clear and comprehensive ideas, ensuring that all points are elaborately explained will enrich the discussion further. Consider adding more specific examples or case studies to illustrate points better.

coherence cohesion

Some transitions between ideas could be smoother. Pay attention to creating seamless connections between paragraphs to make the essay more coherent.

coherence cohesion

The introduction and conclusion are well-presented, offering a clear view of the writer's stance and summing up the discussion effectively.

task achievement

The essay addresses the task effectively, covering the importance of both local and global history, thus providing a complete response.

11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

273 words

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It is more important for school children to learn about local history than world history. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Computers and A.I. technology are increasingly being used for online education. Can artificial intelligence enhance the learning experience? Is this a positive or negative development?

Using computers everyday has more negative effect than positive on children. do you agree or disagree with this notion

Some people believe that **single-sex schools are more beneficial to students because they achieve better academic results.** Others, however, **argue that mixed schools are better since students can develop better social skills**. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some people argue that immigrants should adopt the local culture when immigrating to a new country. An alternative view is that they can adapt to a new environment by establishing a minority community. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Many students choose to take a gap year before starting university, to travel or gain work experience. Do you think is a good idea or a waste of time? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant exaxples from your own knowledge or experience

Some people believe that single-sex schools are more beneficial to students because they achieve better academic results. Others, however, argue that mixed schools are better since students can develop better social skills. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.