Today most people get married and give birth in their 30s rather than when they younger is it positive and negative development in your opinion.

#people #birth #development

this

contemporary era, everything happens in pace-faced

besides

marriage

In these

Change preposition

These

show examples

days, a large number of people marry and birth

children

Change preposition

to children

show examples

after thirty years

Change preposition

apply

show examples

old

instead

of young age. I think

this

is a positive breakthrough and

this

essay discusses it briefly for the following reasons.

To begin

with, later

marriage

brings more

beneficials

Correct your spelling

benefits

to the population who delay

marriage

because

marriage

is a long-term commitment

Correct pronoun usage

that

show examples

requires secure financial stability.

This

means individuals

work-hard

Correct your spelling

work hard

show examples

to earn money and save some amount of fortune for their future and it takes

long

Change the article

a long

show examples

time to settle

Change preposition

apply

show examples

financially that's why many get married after

thirties

Correct pronoun usage

their thirties

show examples

For example

most

Change preposition

in most

show examples

western

Capitalize word

Western

show examples

nations'

person

Fix the agreement mistake

people

show examples

marry and start their family

life

after

thirties

Correct pronoun usage

their thirties

show examples

but they have

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

good wealth to take care of their family members

Change preposition

apply

show examples

financially. Needless to

say

Add a comma

say,

show examples

money

play

Change the verb form

plays

show examples

a crucial role in

marriage

life

so after thirty

get

Wrong verb form

getting

show examples

married can lead to

live

Change the verb form

living

show examples

a happy

life

without financial burden.

Furthermore

, after thirty only people have more maturity to save and protect their family

life

without ego and selflessness.

This

means family

life

is going

Change the article

apply

show examples

long-term and they do not give a chance to divorce because both persons are more mature and they know how to handle the problems and how to raise their children.

For instance

, children perform in academics when their parents

were

Wrong verb form

are

show examples

married after

thirties

Correct pronoun usage

their thirties

show examples

because parents do not disturb their toddler's education through family fights.

Hence

, late

marriage

help

Correct subject-verb agreement

helps

show examples

to grow up

Verb problem

raise

show examples

infants with

peaceful

Correct article usage

a peaceful

show examples

life

. In conclusion, after

thirties

Change the article

the thirties

show examples

getting married can bring enormous benefits to the public

such

save

Wrong verb form

saving

show examples

money and wealth for family commitments

as well as

they may have more maturity and

save

Wrong verb form

saving

show examples

their relationship without getting

divorce

Wrong verb form

divorced

show examples

than younger married couples.

Therefore

, I believe that

this

is a positive development and it brings more windfalls.

Submitted by reanudeepan on Tue Jun 11 2024

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task achievement

Ensure that the essay responds to all aspects of the prompt comprehensively. The essay should discuss both positive and negative aspects if asked for, but in this case, you've chosen to argue it as a positive development which is fine. However, providing a brief mention of counterarguments or negatives can strengthen your essay.

task achievement

Work on providing more specific and relevant examples to support your main points. Specific examples can make your arguments more convincing.

coherence cohesion

Improve the logical flow by ensuring a more comprehensive linking of ideas within and between paragraphs. Transitions can be smoother to enhance readability. For example, using more varied transition phrases would avoid a repetitive structure.

coherence cohesion

Make sure each paragraph clearly supports a single main point relevant to your overall argument, and those points are sufficiently developed and supported by evidence.

coherence cohesion

Clear introduction and conclusion. Both are present and summarize the essay’s stance effectively.

coherence cohesion

Overall logical structure is good. The essay follows a clear pattern and stays on topic, making it easy to follow.

task achievement

The essay has a clear position and articulates the perceived positive aspects of delayed marriages. It remains focused on presenting the positive side.

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
29Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

306 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Today most people get married and give birth in their 30s rather than when they younger is it positive and negative development in your opinion.

Ultimate Speaking practice for IELTS

In some countries, more and more people are becoming interested in finding out about the history of the house or building they live in. What are the reasons for this? How can people research this?

Some schools have restricted the use of mobile phones. Is this a positive development or a negative one?

The number of people who are overweight or obese is far higher than in previous generations. What are the reasons for this, and how can the problem be tackled?

Some people like to spend their leisure time with their colleagues, while others prefer to keep their private life separate from their work life. Is it a good thing to spend leisure time with a colleague?

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+