IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Some people think that it will be one of the best ways to solve the environment problems to increase the cost of fuel for cars and other vehicles. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

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In our modern age, it is argued that environmental problems can be solved by raising the
price
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 of
fuel
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 for cars or other means of transportation.
However
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, the writer of
this
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 essay does not completely support that idea because the
cost
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 will not be effective at the
level
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 of issue.
Additionally
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, there are various methods that can be taken to tackle
this
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 . It is acknowledged that the
cost
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 has some effects on solving pollution.
Nevertheless
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, it is not considered the best way because of its applicability and flexibility. Humans may be annoyed with the increase in the
price
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 of
fuel
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, but it will not be a big trouble for them because they
also
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 can afford it. To be more specific, in recent days,
although
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 the
cost
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 of petroleum has significantly changed, with the high
level
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 of increase, citizens are
also
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 pleased with paying much money for it as they do not have another choice.
That is
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 why the writer claims that the upward trend in the
cost
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 of
fuel
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 will not seriously affect
fuel
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 consumption. Moving onto another side of
this
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 view, there are a lot of ways that the government can apply to reduce the
level
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 of the problem. Society should be encouraged to use alternative
fuels
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 for their vehicles to get the permanent result.
Furthermore
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,
this
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 way can be effective if the
price
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 for those
fuels
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 is at a stable lower
level
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. Take electricity as a good example, it should be used to replace fossil
fuels
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 because of its no harm to the environment.
To sum up
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, some are considering that the lower
price
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 of fossil
fuels
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 has a huge impact on our state
whereas
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 it is claimed that another way of using alternative
fuels
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 will affect more.
However
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, all of the ways should be deliberated on both negative and positive sides.

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task response
Your essay covers most aspects of the topic and presents a clear stance. However, consider elaborating more on your arguments and providing a few more detailed examples to strengthen your points.
coherence cohesion
While your essay follows a logical structure generally, there are some abrupt transitions. Focus on using more linking phrases and sentences for smoother flow between paragraphs.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which provides a concise summary and wraps up your arguments effectively.
task response
You provide valid arguments regarding the limitations of increasing fuel prices and the alternative solutions, such as the use of alternative fuels.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • carbon emissions
  • public transport
  • fuel-efficient
  • electric vehicles
  • renewable energy
  • green technologies
  • disproportionately affect
  • commuting
  • infrastructure development
  • cycling and walking
  • deforestation
  • industrial pollution
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