Parents can punish their children when they do something wrong, agree or not?
It's some argued that
parents
should punish their
if they're Correct pronoun usage
them
worng
. In my view, Correct your spelling
wrong
that is
actually wrong. Parent
should teach and Add an article
A parent
The parent
coummite
Correct your spelling
commit
commute
committed
to
their Change preposition
with
children
. Punish
should not be the only way to the Replace the word
Punishment
children
.
Firsty
, Correct your spelling
Firstly
First
punishment
may cause mental issues. While
Correct word choice
Children
children
may not understand why they are wrong because of misunderstand
. If Change the verb form
misunderstanding
parents
only punish children
because they are wrong, confilt
may happen. Correct your spelling
conflict
confit
For example
, If a children
play knife because of fun. His parentd
want to stop him and punish him. The Correct your spelling
parents
children
must be angry to
what Change preposition
about
his
Correct pronoun usage
their
parents
did. To affort
Correct your spelling
afford
effort
this
problem, parent
must need to understand why their Add an article
the parent
a parent
children
want to do something wrong. Is important to lead the children
in corrertly
.
Correct your spelling
correctly
Secondly
, punishment
damage
Correct subject-verb agreement
damages
to
Change preposition
apply
children
's body
. That may cause lower Fix the agreement mistake
bodies
self-confident
. Replace the word
self-confidence
While
children
get punish
Wrong verb form
punished
from
their Change preposition
by
parents
, their body
must be hurt. Fix the agreement mistake
bodies
Children
maybe
feel their Correct your spelling
may
body
Fix the agreement mistake
bodies
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
unaccpectable
or think he is different Correct your spelling
unacceptable
than
Change the preposition
from
other child
. Because of that, Change the wording
another child
other children
punishment
may make
Verb problem
put
children
get
bad mood Change preposition
in get
in
a long stage. Change preposition
for
This
problem may keep going after they growth
. Replace the word
grow
Accroding
to the report from China, the Correct your spelling
According
children
got
Wrong verb form
getting
punishment
may affect their Replace the word
punished
friend
Replace the word
friendship
relationship
and Fix the agreement mistake
relationships
getting
worse in their homework or tests. The data shows most of the child Wrong verb form
get
afrid
they may get Correct your spelling
afraid
punishment
by their older Replace the word
punished
indivials
. SoCorrect your spelling
individuals
that
, it clearly Correct determiner usage
apply
show
that Change the verb form
shows
puishment
Correct your spelling
punishment
to
the Change preposition
for
children
is wrong.
In conclusion, parents
should not punish thier
Correct your spelling
their
childrens
when they are wrong. Because it may cause mental issues and lower self-review. Correct your spelling
children
Punishent
may Correct your spelling
Punishment
also
affect children
's relationship
and their Fix the agreement mistake
relationships
perform
in daily life. Replace the word
performance
On the other hand
, communtion
Correct your spelling
communication
communion
to
the Change preposition
with
children
is the better way while
Correct word choice
when
children
do something wrong.Submitted by millstonelee on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
Grammar
Improve sentence structure and grammar. Seek extra help or consider using grammar checking tools to catch errors such as subject-verb agreement, punctuation, and spelling mistakes.
Coherence and cohesion
Clarify and organize your ideas before writing. Create a brief outline to ensure your main points are logically structured and effectively connected throughout the essay.
Style and grammar
Use more varied and complex sentence structures. Including diverse phrases and sentence types can make your writing more engaging.
Task achievement
Provide clearer and stronger supporting examples. Ensure that each point you make is backed by well-explained and relevant examples.
Task response
The essay addresses the topic and takes a clear stance against punishment for children.
Coherence and cohesion
Both the introduction and conclusion are present and contribute to the overall structure of the essay.
Task achievement
The essay includes attempts to discuss consequences, such as mental issues and self-confidence, providing a basis for the argument.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?
Ultimate Speaking practice for IELTS
Practice speaking step by step, answer real-life questions, and build your confidence. Start your free trial and improve your speaking skills today!