in some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people why might this be the case? do you think this is a positive or negative situation?

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From the past, we can learn that all humans need a comfortable place to live in, called
home
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. In some nations, having a house rather than renting one is a crucial thing for people. There are a few backgrounds why that thing happens, and I
thus
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believe it is a very positive development for two main reasons. Nowadays, in some countries, folks tend to own a
home
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for some reasons.
Firstly
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, from the data on the Internet or the Government's statistics, we can see that the price of houses in some areas around the world will be high time by time. It happens as there is a development of the place in the resident's neighbourhood.
For instance
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, if folks want to buy a
home
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near Juanda airport right now, they need to splash the cash for about one billion Indonesian Rupiahs as there are some places built there
such
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as Chinese food restaurants, Juanda hospital, etc.
In contrast
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, they just need to pay under five hundred million Indonesian Rupiahs if they bought the
home
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in that area ten years ago.
Secondly
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, when the families choose to be renters of a
home
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, sometimes the
owner
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forces them to leave from house immediately for nonsense. That behaviour of the
owner
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makes people not interested in renting accommodation. Not only they must look for new accommodation in rush time, but
also
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they must pay the cost of moving the furniture. Becoming a holder of the
property
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is very important for individuals recently.
To begin
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with, they don't need to pay the cost of rental as they are the holder. They can exchange the charge of renting to buy other things
such
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as items of furniture, health assurance, education, etc or even save it.
Then
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, if they have a
property
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on their own, they can renovate their accommodation like they want to.
In contrast
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, if they are a renter, they need permission from the
owner
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to renovate, and sometimes the
owner
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does not allow that.
Therefore
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, they can build a kitchen, garden, bedroom, or other rooms as needed if they are the
owner
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. In conclusion, recently many people have preferred to have a
home
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than become a renter because the amount of the
property
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will increase in the future, and some owners of rented houses tend to do harmful things.
Furthermore
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, if folks become
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the
a
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holder of the
property
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, it will get them some advantages
such
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as they can save more money as they don't need to pay tariffs and they can renovate the rooms on their own.

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task response
The task is achieved fairly well, but the examples provided should be more precise and varied to strengthen the argument.
coherence cohesion
Ensure the flow between paragraphs is smoother, and use linking words and phrases to enhance coherence.
coherence cohesion
Some sentences could be clearer. Avoid repetition and be more concise.
introduction
The introduction clearly states the topic and the stance of the author.
task response
Each main point is supported by examples, making the essay informative and persuasive.
conclusion
The conclusion nicely summarizes the essay's main points, contributing to a coherent end.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • ownership
  • renting
  • importance
  • sense of security
  • stability
  • financial investment
  • asset
  • customize
  • decorate
  • belonging
  • community
  • potential
  • future generations
  • long-term
  • cost advantage
  • control
  • living space
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