Some people think that tennage years are the happiest part of the people's lives.others believe that adultery is better ..discuss both views and give your opinion.
Nowadays, there
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
debated
Replace the word
debate
of
which Change preposition
about
part
of the human age is the happiest in the human lifetime. Some people
believe that teenagers
Fix the agreement mistake
teenager
is
Change the verb form
are
a
happiest Change the article
the
part
, while
the
others believe being Correct article usage
apply
adults
is the happiest Fix the agreement mistake
adult
part
in
our life. In my opinion, It depends Change preposition
of
by
several Change preposition
on
point
of Change to a plural noun
points
views
, since Fix the agreement mistake
view
the
each Remove the article
apply
time
has its own advantages part
.
When talk
about Change the verb form
talking
teenagers
Change noun form
teenagers'
teenager's
life
, of Fix the agreement mistake
lives
course
the benefits of Add the comma(s)
course,
this
year is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
about
having plenty of Change preposition
apply
time
and having many friends. Since the things that the
Correct article usage
apply
teenagers
should think Change preposition
about is
is
only studying, Correct subject-verb agreement
are
then
it makes
them having much Verb problem
gives
free
Change preposition
of free
time
. Also
, in these ages, mostly
Correct your spelling
most
people
are not married yet, so they can freely socialize with their friends without thinking about their couple or their children is
waiting for them. So, with Unnecessary verb
apply
this
much free time
and freedom to socialize, then
it makes the teenage years
is
the best Correct subject-verb agreement
are
part
in
Change preposition
of
lifetime
.
Add an article
a lifetime
On the other hand
, since the teenagers
' money is coming from their parents, therefore
some people
with
the middle class Change preposition
in
which
have Correct pronoun usage
who
limited
economy would think it is better if they're working so they can have money that can be used for their Correct article usage
a limited
entertainments
, Fix the agreement mistake
entertainment
such
as travelling, visiting fancy places, buying random things, and etc. Beside
that, most Replace the word
Besides
people
will feel ease
to use the money made Change preposition
at ease
by
their own rather than coming from their parents, because they wouldn't mind if it Change preposition
on
spends
on Wrong verb form
is spent
the
things that Correct article usage
apply
don't
important or don't give positive benefits.
In conclusion, every human year Verb problem
aren't
have
its own Change the verb form
has
beneficial
, especially for teenage and adult age. When Replace the word
benefits
talk
about Change the verb form
talking
time
and friends, the teenage years
are better than the adult years
. But when it is seen from the access to enjoy the life entertainments, the adult years
are the betterSubmitted by rlsatria on
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coherence cohesion
Consider using a more structured approach for your arguments to enhance logical flow. For instance, dedicate separate paragraphs to specific perspectives.
task achievement
Include more specific examples to support your arguments. This will make your essay more compelling and concrete.
task achievement
You have provided a balanced discussion by considering both teenage and adult years.
coherence cohesion
The essay flows relatively well, with clear paragraphs and separation of ideas.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
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