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Writing Samples
Band 6

the diagram shows how liverton docks change since 1980

the diagram shows how liverton docks change since 1980
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The map illustrates two images, which depict Liverton
dock's
Capitalize word
Dock's
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 transformation from 1980 to nowadays.
Overall
Linking Words
, the map at the top basically shows a large area of the
river
Use synonyms
 with ships and the process of construction of new buildings in 1980,
while
Linking Words
 the diagram at the bottom shows the urbanized city today.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, in 1980, two warehouses were situated on
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
one
side
Use synonyms
 of the
river
Use synonyms
 and between them was located one
crane
Use synonyms
, and the second
crane
Use synonyms
 was adjacent to the eastern house. One more warehouse was placed on the other
side
Use synonyms
 of the
river
Use synonyms
, where on the western
side
Use synonyms
 was located a
crane
Use synonyms
. And
in
Change preposition
on
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 the eastern
side
Use synonyms
 extended the coast. The
river
Use synonyms
 has been full of ships.
However
Linking Words
, there were a lot of changes here. The education centre and kid's playground have replaced warehouses on the northern
side
Use synonyms
 of the lake, and
instead
Linking Words
 of a third home, was a newly built apartment. Along to
playground
Correct article usage
the playground
show examples
 on the western part was constructed sailing
clubwas
Correct your spelling
clubs
club was
, which replaced the
crane
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, and another
crane
Use synonyms
 on the eastern
side
Use synonyms
 was removed. 1/3 part of the coast became the parking. Construction near to apartment has been done on the project hotel. Regarding the
river
Use synonyms
, it has developed into a ship museum with a bridge.

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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words river, side, crane with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "map" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "shows" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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