Some people think that the government is wasting money on the arts and that this money could be better spent elsewhere. To what extent do you agree with this view?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Governments have a growing interest in
art
Use synonyms
today.
However
Linking Words
, some people who do not share
this
Linking Words
passion claim that
money
Use synonyms
spent on
art
Use synonyms
is a waste of revenue.
While
Linking Words
others think highly of
arts
Fix the agreement mistake
art
show examples
and appreciate investing in it.
This
Linking Words
essay will explain each point of view, and explain why I am inclined to agree with the latter opinion. On the one hand, many people think that
money
Use synonyms
rather be spent
elsewhere
Linking Words
than
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
arts,
this
Linking Words
notion is mostly driven by social, cultural, societal, and geographical
background
Fix the agreement mistake
backgrounds
show examples
.
In other words
Linking Words
, some cultures do not consider
a
Correct pronoun usage
it a
show examples
significant part of people’s lives.
However
Linking Words
, some statesmen would disagree, as they believe that
art
Use synonyms
will differentiate them from other countries.
For instance
Linking Words
, a study conducted by Toronto University showed that the public
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
more interested in developing the health sector, or growing
economy
Correct article usage
the economy
show examples
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, others think that
art
Use synonyms
is more spiritual, and meaningful than people might perceive.
Therefore
Linking Words
,
governments
Fix the agreement mistake
government
show examples
spending on it is crucial for the cognitive ability to enhance the comradery sense in societies.
Moreover
Linking Words
, I believe that
lack
Correct article usage
a lack
show examples
of knowledge on how
money
Use synonyms
spent
Add a missing verb
is spent
show examples
on
art
Use synonyms
is a great source of income, as it can provide
a tremendous benefits
Correct the article-noun agreement
tremendous benefits
a tremendous benefit
show examples
; not only to an individual, but
also
Linking Words
to
enriching
Wrong verb form
enrich
show examples
cultural diversity.
For instance
Linking Words
, being known as a country of
art
Use synonyms
will potentially attract all
art
Use synonyms
lovers to visit and witness a new form of
art
Use synonyms
,
hence
Linking Words
it could be one of the most significant reasons for
economy
Add an article
the economy
an economy
show examples
to thrive, which in turn leads to increasing assets. In conclusion, investing in all
art
Use synonyms
form
Fix the agreement mistake
forms
show examples
is another way of
recycled
Replace the word
recycling
show examples
money
Use synonyms
, as it is mostly gonna come back in another form like
tourisim
Correct your spelling
tourism
. For governments to be interested in
art
Use synonyms
is crucial for enriching
countries
Change noun form
countries'
country's
show examples
income.
Submitted by alamer_ma on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Try to avoid minor grammatical and wording mistakes to enhance readability and accuracy.
task achievement
Ensure that all points presented are comprehensively addressed with supporting details.
coherence cohesion
Enhance logical flow by clearly connecting ideas within and between paragraphs.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that examples provided are relevant and specific to illustrate your points effectively.
introduction conclusion present
Good introduction that sets the context and states the writer’s stance clearly.
introduction conclusion present
Effective conclusion that summarizes the main points and reiterates the author's viewpoint.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • enriching society
  • promoting cultural understanding
  • development of talent
  • creative industries
  • economic benefits
  • generate revenue
  • cultural heritage
  • identity
  • prioritize spending
  • needs of the majority
What to do next:
Look at other essays: