Some people think that the government is wasting money on the arts and that this money could be better spent elsewhere. To what extent do you agree with this view?
Governments have a growing interest in
art
today. However
, some people who do not share this
passion claim that money
spent on art
is a waste of revenue. While
others think highly of arts
and appreciate investing in it. Fix the agreement mistake
art
This
essay will explain each point of view, and explain why I am inclined to agree with the latter opinion.
On the one hand, many people think that money
rather be spent elsewhere
than in
arts, Change preposition
on
this
notion is mostly driven by social, cultural, societal, and geographical background
. Fix the agreement mistake
backgrounds
In other words
, some cultures do not consider a
significant part of people’s lives. Correct pronoun usage
it a
However
, some statesmen would disagree, as they believe that art
will differentiate them from other countries. For instance
, a study conducted by Toronto University showed that the public are
more interested in developing the health sector, or growing Change the verb form
is
economy
.
Correct article usage
the economy
On the other hand
, others think that art
is more spiritual, and meaningful than people might perceive. Therefore
, governments
spending on it is crucial for the cognitive ability to enhance the comradery sense in societies. Fix the agreement mistake
government
Moreover
, I believe that lack
of knowledge on how Correct article usage
a lack
money
spent
on Add a missing verb
is spent
art
is a great source of income, as it can provide a tremendous benefits
; not only to an individual, but Correct the article-noun agreement
tremendous benefits
a tremendous benefit
also
to enriching
cultural diversity. Wrong verb form
enrich
For instance
, being known as a country of art
will potentially attract all art
lovers to visit and witness a new form of art
, hence
it could be one of the most significant reasons for economy
to thrive, which in turn leads to increasing assets.
In conclusion, investing in all Add an article
the economy
an economy
art
form
is another way of Fix the agreement mistake
forms
recycled
Replace the word
recycling
money
, as it is mostly gonna come back in another form like tourisim
. For governments to be interested in Correct your spelling
tourism
art
is crucial for enriching countries
income.Change noun form
countries'
country's
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task achievement
Try to avoid minor grammatical and wording mistakes to enhance readability and accuracy.
task achievement
Ensure that all points presented are comprehensively addressed with supporting details.
coherence cohesion
Enhance logical flow by clearly connecting ideas within and between paragraphs.
coherence cohesion
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introduction conclusion present
Good introduction that sets the context and states the writer’s stance clearly.
introduction conclusion present
Effective conclusion that summarizes the main points and reiterates the author's viewpoint.
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