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Writing Samples
Band 6

Some people says that it is a waste of public money to spend on cultural events, others disagree. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #waste #money #events
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Some people believe that allocating public funds to cultural
events
Use synonyms
 is a misuse of resources. They argue that there are more pressing needs,
such
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 as healthcare, education, and infrastructure, that should be prioritized over cultural festivities.
According to
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this
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 view, cultural
events
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 are seen as non-essential and a luxury that should not be financed by taxpayers' money, especially in times of economic hardship or when other public sectors are underfunded.
On the other hand
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, proponents of spending public money on cultural
events
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 argue that these activities play a crucial role in preserving cultural heritage, promoting social cohesion, and boosting tourism. They believe that cultural
events
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 enrich the community, offering educational opportunities, fostering a sense of pride, and encouraging unity among diverse groups within the society.
Additionally
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, these
events
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 can have a positive economic impact by attracting tourists and stimulating local economies. In my opinion,
while
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 it is essential to ensure that foundational sectors
such
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 as healthcare and education are adequately funded, investing in cultural
events
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 can
also
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 yield significant benefits for society. Culture is an integral part of a nation's identity, and public
events
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 provide an accessible platform for all members of the community to engage with and appreciate their cultural heritage.
Furthermore
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, the economic and social returns from these
events
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 often outweigh the initial investment, making them a worthwhile use of public funds.
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task achievement
To further improve, ensure that your arguments are substantiated with more specific examples or quantitative data where possible. This will strengthen your case and make your points more convincing.
coherence cohesion
Try to create a more compelling introduction and conclusion. An engaging hook or overarching statement at the beginning and a summary or reflective conclusion can make the essay feel more rounded.
coherence cohesion
Your essay follows a logical structure, making it easy to follow your arguments from start to finish.
task achievement
You have addressed the task comprehensively, discussing both viewpoints and clearly articulating your own opinion.
coherence cohesion
The main points are well-supported and relevant to the topic, showcasing a good understanding of the subject matter.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • allocating
  • pressing needs
  • prioritized
  • non-essential
  • luxury
  • taxpayers' money
  • economic hardship
  • underfunded
  • proponents
  • cultural heritage
  • social cohesion
  • boosting tourism
  • enrich
  • educational opportunities
  • fostering
  • sense of pride
  • encouraging unity
  • diverse groups
  • positive economic impact
  • attracting tourists
  • stimulating local economies
  • foundational sectors
  • adequately funded
  • integral part
  • nation's identity
  • accessible platform
  • engaging with
  • appreciating
  • returns
  • initial investment
  • worthwhile
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