It’s generally believed that some people are born with certain talents, for instance, music and sport and others are not. However, it’s sometimes claimed that any child can be taught to become a good sportsperson or musician. Discuss both points of view and give your own opinion.
It is argued that some offspring have natural talents,
while
others suppose that teaching can make kids become masters in sports or singing.I firmly believe that having an outstanding genius has more benefits than having a gift
for music and athletics.
On the one hand,there are some advantages and disadvantages when offspring have natural talent in sport and music.The offspring can develop their capability as musicians or sportsmen by
hard work and investment from family and society that can help them broaden their career opportunities in the future. Change preposition
through
In contrast
,those children are likely to be arrogant leading to a lack of determination to improve their abilities,ultimately their gift
will disappear.
On the other hand
,there are some
certain issues regarding the kids who are educated to be talented sportsmen or musicians.In the journey of becoming a talent,they may accumulate many Correct quantifier usage
apply
skills
which can be useful when they learn something new in the future.Otherwise
,when they start the work,although
initially
their career may not be as successful as other Add a comma
initially,
people
,they can climb the ladder of success by
those Change preposition
through
skills
learned in the past.For example
,whether children improve their flair for piano by playing it and finding their mistakes every day can provide them with creative skills
and risk-taking skills
.On the contrary
,there are some cases in which normal people
can not win the people
who are born with talent such
as the pre-eminence in physical health.Particularly,they may concentrate too much on how to defeat those people
and use negative ways instead
of finding a happier path for them
In conclusion,i
reaffirm my conviction that having an outstanding Change the capitalization
I
gift
has more benefits than having a gift
for melody and athletics.Submitted by nguyentungchi345 on
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coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph clearly supports your main argument. The transitions between paragraphs could be more fluid.
coherence cohesion
Avoid repetition in your conclusion. Instead, succinctly summarize your main points to reinforce your stance.
task achievement
Provide more detailed examples to illustrate your points, which would enhance the overall argument and make it more persuasive.
task achievement
Clarify and expand on key ideas to better articulate your position on the topic. This will demonstrate a more in-depth understanding and engagement with the prompt.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction, body, and conclusion, making it easy to follow.
task achievement
The writer addresses both points of view as required by the prompt and provides a personal opinion, showing a full understanding of the task.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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