IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

The chart below shows the expenditure of two countries on consumer goods in 2010. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The chart below shows the expenditure of two countries on consumer goods in 2010. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#expenditure #two #countries #consumer #goods #information #features #comparisons
The chart shows the the expenditure of the United Kingdom and
France
 . which includes the
the
Remove the redundancy
apply
show examples
presice
Correct your spelling
price
 amount
in
Change preposition
for
show examples
 each of the 5 consumer goods ,
such
 as Cars, Computers ,Books ,Perfume , And Camera , which are measured in
pound
Fix the agreement mistake
pounds
show examples
 sterling .
Overall
 , for both countries the highest
expedentures
Correct your spelling
expenditure
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 Cars ,
while
 in the for U.
K
. the lowest payments is
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 Cameras , as
oppossed
Correct your spelling
opposed
 to
French
Correct article usage
the French
show examples
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
 is
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 perfumes .
Firstly
 , the
expedentures
Correct your spelling
expenditures
 of cars is the highest in both
U.
Correct article usage
the U.K.
show examples
K
. and
France
 ,
however
Add a comma
however,
show examples
 the United Kingdom
expedentures
Correct your spelling
expenditures
 is exactly 450
thousand
 ,
while
France
 is at level 400
thousand
 which is lower in
compartion
Correct your spelling
comparison
 with
U.
Correct article usage
the U.K.
show examples
K
. ,
on the other hand
, the lowest
expedentures
Correct your spelling
expenditures
 in the U.
K
. is for perfumes
its
Replace the word
it's
it is
show examples
 around 150
thousand
 ,
while
france
Change the capitalization
France
show examples
 is exactly 150
thousand
 pounds sterling in terms of cameras For
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Computers and books , both
france
Change the capitalization
France
show examples
 and uk are around the same level in terms of
computres
Correct your spelling
computers
,
median
Add an article
a median
the median
show examples
 of 370
thousand
 ,
while
 the books payments for the
uk
Correct your spelling
UK
 and
france
Change the capitalization
France
show examples
 are exactly 400
thounsans
Correct your spelling
thousand
thousands
 and 300
thousand
 respectively .
Submitted by nouf.alkhalaifi2 on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 71%.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words france, expedentures, k, thousand with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "shows" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: Only 4 basic words for charts were used.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
▼

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