IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The graph below shows the number of tourists visiting a particular Caribbean island between 2010 and 2017. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The graph below shows the number of tourists visiting a particular Caribbean island between 2010 and 2017. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#tourists #caribbean #island #summarise #information #features #comparisons
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The given graph illustrates the
sum
Use synonyms
 of
visitors
Use synonyms
 that
visiting
Wrong verb form
visited
show examples
 a Caribbean
island
Use synonyms
 from 2010 to 2017. Units are measured by millions of tourists.
Overall
Linking Words
, it can clearly be seen that the
number
Use synonyms
 of tourists both staying on
cruise
Use synonyms
 ships and on
Use synonyms
island
Add an article
the island
show examples
were
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
increased throughout the given period. In terms of the
number
Use synonyms
 of the folk that
rooming
Replace the word
room
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 on
cruise
Use synonyms
 boats stood at around 0,25 in 2010.
Although
Linking Words
on
Change preposition
in
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coming
Correct article usage
the coming
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 year it had a slight increase, in 2012 the
number
Use synonyms
 was back again like at the beginning. In 2013, the
sum
Use synonyms
 of
visitors
Use synonyms
 that
staying
Wrong verb form
stayed
show examples
 on
cruise
Use synonyms
 ships increased slightly at exactly 0,5, before reaching a peak at 2 in 2017.
Regarding the
Change preposition
The
show examples
 total
number
Use synonyms
 of tourists that staying on
Use synonyms
island
Add an article
the island
show examples
 stood at just over 0,5 in the first year. Even though the
sum
Use synonyms
 of
visitors
Use synonyms
 who
rooming
Wrong verb form
roomed
show examples
 on
Use synonyms
island
Correct article usage
the island
show examples
stuck
Add a missing verb
was stuck
show examples
 in 2011, it witnessed a moderate climb to around 1,25 in 2012.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, the
sum
Use synonyms
 of people who
staying
Wrong verb form
stayed
show examples
 on
Use synonyms
island
Correct article usage
the island
show examples
 peaked at 1,5 in the following three years.
Although
Linking Words
 it had a slight drop in 2016, the
number
Use synonyms
back
Add a missing verb
was back
show examples
 at
peak
Correct article usage
a peak
show examples
 in 2017. So, the total
number
Use synonyms
 of
visitors
Use synonyms
 both staying on
cruise
Use synonyms
 ships and
Use synonyms
island
Fix the agreement mistake
islands
show examples
 peaked at 3,5 in the
last
Linking Words
 period.
Submitted by alfathemaster on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "although".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words sum, visitors, island, number, cruise with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "number of" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "give" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "stood" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "slight" was used 3 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • fluctuating trend
  • initially
  • significant increase
  • slight decline
  • momentary setback
  • steady increase
  • minor fluctuations
  • reaching a peak
  • moderate growth
  • notable growth
  • surge in popularity
  • seasonal or yearly factors
  • stagnation
  • growing appeal
  • visitors worldwide
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