Some species of animals are almost extinct; and many others seem to be fast approaching a similar risk. What are the reasons for this? What should be done to solve this problem?

One of the most pressing environmental concerns of the modern age is animal conservation. It is apparent that many
species
of
animals
are facing extinction which has devastating consequences for the diversity of life on our planet. The purpose of
this
essay is to examine the reasons for
this
problem and suggest some preventative measures. The major threat to the survival of animal
species
is humankind.
This
is clear in the illegal poaching of endangered
animals
like tigers and rhinos which are hunted for sport and to be sold on the black market. Many
species
of fish are
also
the victims of overfishing which has a disastrous
effect
on fish numbers.
However
, we have
also
had a profound
effect
on animal life in the way in which we live. Rapid urbanisation over the
last
one hundred years has had a highly destructive
effect
as cities and towns encroach on many animal’s ecosystems.
Also
, in order to sustain our growing population, more and more space is needed for agriculture.
This
is most evident in the deforestation of the Amazon rainforest which has endangered many
species
. One final negative human influence can be seen in the changing environment. Animal ecosystems are the result of millions of years of evolution whereby the
animals
have adapted to their surroundings. Climate change threatens to alter these surroundings at an incredible rate which could have cataclysmic results for many
animals
. A clear example of
this
is the habitat of the polar bear which is expected to be drastically reduced over the next few decades. Despite these
problems
Add a comma
problems,
show examples
there are some measures that could be taken to address the problem. Governments around the world need to share responsibility for protecting
animals
and implement more severe punishments for animal poachers and hunters. We can
also
have larger protected areas and national parks where human activity is limited. Perhaps the most difficult problem to address is that of climate change which would mean a dramatic change in human behaviour. In conclusion, we can see that humans are having a very negative
effect
on animal numbers. We need to take responsibility for the protection of animal numbers by reducing the number of
animals
being killed directly and indirectly by human activity.
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coherence cohesion
To further improve your essay, consider elaborating slightly more on potential solutions for combating climate change, as this portion was briefly mentioned and is a complex issue. Additionally, ensure that transitions between some ideas are seamlessly connected to enhance overall coherence.
task achievement
To elevate the task response score, you could delve deeper into specific global initiatives or success stories of conservation efforts. This will help in demonstrating a more comprehensive grasp of the topic.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are clear and provide a strong framework for the essay.
task achievement
The essay contains relevant and specific examples, such as the illegal poaching of tigers and deforestation in the Amazon rainforest, which effectively support your main points.
task achievement
You have presented clear and comprehensive ideas throughout the essay, making it easy to follow your argument.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • species extinction
  • endangered animals
  • biodiversity
  • habitat loss
  • deforestation
  • urbanization
  • poaching
  • illegal wildlife trade
  • climate change
  • pollution
  • conservation efforts
  • legislation
  • enforcement
  • human overpopulation
  • sustainable development
  • responsible consumption
  • education
  • awareness programs
  • protected areas
  • wildlife reserves
  • international cooperation
  • collaboration
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