What do you think are the main causes of inequality between rich and poor nations in the world? What can be done to reduce this gap? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

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What are the basic reasons that some people are wealthy,

while

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others are living in poverty? What action should be taken to decrease

this

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difference? There are limited resources on our planet which provide richness. Contrary, the honest distribution of it will minimize the distinctions between rich and poor people.

However

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, from the beginning of human beings, there are some who have better living conditions than others.

However

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, the secret of their fortune is that they owe or control the resource base.

For example

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, Bill Gates is the richest man in the World, his personal status costs over 20 billion dollars,

according to

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data collected by Forbes magazine in 2016. Mr.Gates controls his company which provides software. The organization is a resource, and controlling it makes his wealth grow.

Also

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, The Microsoft Company is a single one, obviously, it is limited.

On the other hand

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, your own intelligence is a tool that can make you rich anyway, because you can create technology letting make money.

Nevertheless

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, the sign of developed civilization is the fair distribution of resources among civilians, which is a way of reducing differences between populations.

For example

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, there are different States with kinds of political issues,

such

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as China and the U.S.A. Both of them have billionaires and poor men. Both governments are efficient in distributing resources. The statistics agency John Smith and Co. says these countries have the lowest level of poverty,

otherwise

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, they have the biggest amount of millionaires. Respectively, a poverty level of 5.7% and 4.6% and a wealth level of 7.8% and 10.1%.

Due to

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unwise policy, like the Oligarchy, the size of differences can be huge. In conclusion, the reason to get rich is owing or controlling stocks, but the way to make it fair is to distribute truthfully.

interclass1982Mon Jun 17 2024

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coherence cohesion

Work on improving the logical flow of ideas. The essay seems to jump between points without smooth transitions. Consider using more cohesive devices to link your arguments and ideas effectively.

task achievement

Ensure that all parts of the question are addressed comprehensively. While you have provided reasons and examples, make sure they are clearly tied to the main argument and that each paragraph has a clear central idea that is well-developed.

task achievement

Provide more specific examples and explanations to support your points. This would make your arguments more compelling and concrete.

coherence cohesion

Focus on clearer topic sentences for each paragraph to help guide the reader through your essay.

task achievement

You have addressed both causes of inequality and potential solutions, which demonstrates a good understanding of the task requirements.

coherence cohesion

Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps to frame your argument and provide a sense of closure.

task achievement

Your use of real-world examples, such as references to Bill Gates and different countries, adds relevance and demonstrates an ability to connect the topic to real-life situations.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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11
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

297 words

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What do you think are the main causes of inequality between rich and poor nations in the world? What can be done to reduce this gap? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Your opinion

Health services are a basic necessity. However private companies have made them quite costly foe ordinary individuals. Do the advantages of private health care outweighs it's disadvantages

Many think that religion should be taught in schools while others think it should be avoided. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

A report indicated that many children between 7 and 11 years old watch television and/or play video games too much. How does the problem affect? What measures can be taken to control it?

Some people think that the range of technology currently available is increasing the gap between rich people and poor people. Others think that it is causing the opposite effect. Discuss both views and give your opinion.