IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The chart below gives information about how families in one country spent their weekly income in 1968 and 2018.

The chart below gives information about how families in one country spent their weekly income in 1968 and 2018.
#information #families #country #income
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The chart shows the spending
according to
Linking Words
 eight different categories as
Add an article
a percent
show examples
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 of weekly
income
Use synonyms
 in one country in 1968 and 2018.
First,
Linking Words
in 1968
average
Correct article usage
the average
show examples
 family spent on food 35% of
total
Correct pronoun usage
their total
show examples
 weekly
income
Use synonyms
,
Change preposition
on, while
show examples
while
Linking Words
rest
Correct article usage
the rest
show examples
 categories
viried
Correct your spelling
varied
 from 5% to 10%.
However
Linking Words
, in 2018 the expenses of leisure were
main
Add an article
the main
a main
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 part of the budget,
accounted
Wrong verb form
accounting
show examples
 for approximately 22%, followed by housing with around 18%, and moving food to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
third place,
slighly
Correct your spelling
slightly
 above the
expeditures
Correct your spelling
expenditure
expenditures
 on transport.
In addition
Linking Words
, spending on personal
good
Fix the agreement mistake
goods
show examples
, fuel and power, and closing and
footware
Correct your spelling
footwear
 halved,
accounted
Wrong verb form
accounting
show examples
 for less than 5% of weekly
income
Use synonyms
.
Finally
Linking Words
, household goods were roughly 7% in both 1968 and 2018.
Overall
Linking Words
, during
fifty-year
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the fifty-year
a fifty-year
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 period of
time
Add a comma
time,
show examples
 the average weekly spending as part of weekly
income
Use synonyms
 changed a lot.
Budget
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The budget
show examples
 on food halved,
spendings
Correct your spelling
spending
show examples
 on housing, transport,
leisure
Correct word choice
and leisure
show examples
 increased, and on personal
good
Fix the agreement mistake
goods
show examples
, fuel and power, and closing and
footware
Correct your spelling
footwear
 decreased, and only household
good
Fix the agreement mistake
goods
show examples
 remained at the same level.
Submitted by vikiregev on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words income with synonyms.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Weekly income
  • Expenditure
  • Consumption patterns
  • Cost of living
  • Discretionary spending
  • Inflation
  • Economic indicators
  • Demographics
  • Socio-economic factors
  • Technology advancements
  • Government policies
  • Consumerism
  • Lifestyle changes
  • Fiscal habits
  • Budget allocation
  • Financial priorities
  • Societal trends
  • Purchasing power
  • Income distribution
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