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Writing Samples
Band 7

eople now have the freedom to work and live anywhere in the world due to the development of communication technology and transportation. Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

#eople #freedom #work #world #development #communication #technology #transportation
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The
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 advent of sophisticated communication technology and enhanced transportation has dramatically changed how people live and
work
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, offering unprecedented freedom in choosing their locations.
This
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 progression presents numerous benefits,
although
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 it
also
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 entails certain drawbacks.
This
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 essay will contend that the advantages of
this
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 freedom surpass the disadvantages. One major benefit is the improvement in
work
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-life balance. Remote
work
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 capabilities enable individuals to reside in more affordable and desirable areas, away from crowded and expensive metropolitan regions.
This
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 flexibility minimizes commuting time and stress, promoting a healthier and more efficient workforce.
Additionally
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, it allows people to stay closer to their families and local communities, strengthening personal bonds and societal connections.
Moreover
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, businesses gain from
this
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 trend as well. They can tap into a global talent pool, hiring top candidates irrespective of their physical location.
This
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 not only boosts diversity and innovation within the company but
also
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 results in cost savings on office space and other overhead expenses.
Furthermore
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, it permits companies to operate continuously by employing workers across different time zones, thereby enhancing productivity and service availability.
Nevertheless
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, there are significant drawbacks. A prominent issue is the potential for isolation and the reduction of in-person interaction, which can impair team cohesion and communication. The absence of a structured office environment might
also
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 lead to distractions and decreased
work
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 discipline for some individuals.
Additionally
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, concerns about data security and privacy arise as more sensitive information is exchanged over digital platforms. In summary,
although
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 the freedom to
work
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 and live anywhere
due to
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 advancements in communication technology and transportation introduces certain challenges, the benefits—
such
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 as enhanced
work
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-life balance, access to a global talent pool, and business cost efficiencies—are considerably more substantial.
Hence
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,
it is clear that
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 the positive aspects of
this
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 development outweigh the negative ones. Call started 3:04 PM
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task achievement
Consider incorporating more specific examples to further support your arguments. Illustrative examples can make your points more relatable and persuasive.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each point is connected with clear transitional phrases to improve the flow of the essay. For instance, using phrases like 'on the other hand' or 'in contrast' when presenting counterarguments can provide smoother transitions between paragraphs.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a strong introduction and conclusion, clearly setting up the topic and summarizing your stance effectively.
coherence cohesion
The essay is logically structured with well-organized paragraphs, each addressing a distinct point.
task achievement
You provided comprehensive ideas and covered multiple aspects of the topic, demonstrating a complete response to the prompt.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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