Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Many argue that competing in a variety of daily environments is positive,
while
others feel a focus on
cooperation
would be ideal. In my opinion,
although
competition
can yield transformational results, it is more valuable to embrace
cooperation
as a guiding principle. Those who argue in favour of
competition
contend that it serves as a powerful motivation. Examples of the impact of
cooperation
extend to all segments of life, including school and
work
. In schools, the desire to compete can lead a student to study harder than their classmates in order to achieve better grades and secure esteem from teachers and family members. At
work
,
competition
for promotions and higher compensation packages is the entire reason that individuals
work
diligently in the majority of company contexts.
However
, at home,
competition
rarely has positive ramifications. Family members who are consistently competing for admiration and recognition are likely to suffer from some degree of poor mental health. Indeed, there is greater value in fostering a cooperative environment. When individuals
work
together in teams, whether it be at school,
work
, or in the home, they are more likely to experience high levels of motivation, and more crucially, enjoyment.
Competition
can serve as a catalyst for achievement but is unlikely to engender the same levels of unifying satisfaction. A standout example of
this
would be the dynamics present on a sports team at any level of
competition
. Even though the players on the team are engaged in a
competition
, the most memorable and lasting memories of their experiences are more likely to come from small moments of comradery shared with teammates.
This
is the reason that many cite moments spent working in groups towards a common goal as the highlights of life. In conclusion,
although
competition
can encourage innovation,
cooperation
provides a more vital environment of mutual respect and enjoyment of life. Depending on the situation, it is
therefore
imperative to seek cooperative understanding.
Submitted by ieltswritingpracticedl on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Ensure that each argument is supported with specific examples. While the essay covers competition in school, work, and home, concrete examples in each area can further strengthen the argument.
coherence cohesion
To improve coherence, make sure each paragraph links smoothly to the next. This can be achieved by using transitional phrases and ensuring that topics flow logically from one point to the next.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear and well-organized structure with an introduction, main body, and conclusion, which makes it easy to follow.
coherence cohesion
The introduction clearly outlines the debate and the writer's stance, and the conclusion effectively summarizes the main points and reinforces the opinion stated.
task achievement
The essay presents clear and comprehensive ideas, addressing both the advantages and disadvantages of competition, as well as promoting cooperation.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • innovation
  • productivity
  • excel
  • outperform
  • advancements
  • academic standards
  • work ethic
  • stress
  • anxiety
  • unhealthy rivalries
  • harmonious
  • supportive
  • collaborative learning
  • social skills
  • communication skills
  • sense of community
  • collective goals
What to do next:
Look at other essays: