Many developed countries are giving financial aid to poor countries. However, this hasn’t solved the problem of poverty in these nations and so other types of help are needed. To what extent do you agree or disagree with the statement?
In
this
economic distress , Many of the developed countries
had been funding the less fortunate countries
. This
subject had
always been debatable in regards to the impact of solving the financial distress . In my opinion , I disagree with Wrong verb form
has
this
notation and In this
essay , I will further
elaborate my view , in order to reach a logical conclusion.
Overall
, the primary reason for funding poor countries
, is that it globally affects the economy , whether from the lender perspective or even the borrower .
First and foremost , Giving funds will not only benefit the poor countries
by the ability to develop the infrastructure and improve the country ,
it will Add the word(s)
, but
also
help the developed countries
to invest their retained earning by lending and getting an intrest
with high return because of the high risk involved by the lending process . It is essential Correct your spelling
interest
especially
with the high rates Add the comma(s)
, especially
in
inflation that Change preposition
of
causes
a decrease in the money value over time . Correct subject-verb agreement
cause
For example
United States has made a loan to South Africa by issuing treasury bonds this
led to a high rate in
return for the U.S. and Change preposition
of
improves
South Africa by gaining financial support to enable its schools .
Wrong verb form
improved
Secondly
, as mentioned before for
the advantages Change preposition
apply
in
both the lender which is the developed country and the borrower Change preposition
for
that
is the poor country . There Correct pronoun usage
which
is
some aspects to consider , Change the verb form
are
while
financial funding is madantory
and beneficial , it must be aligned with other practical initiatives Correct your spelling
mandatory
such
as transfering
Correct your spelling
transferring
experties
to support them in multiple things , whether for educational Correct your spelling
expertise
puposes
Correct your spelling
purposes
such
as getting teachers to educate and guide the younger one's ,
or by having highly experienced engineers to help Remove the comma
apply
bulid
houses and among other buildings .
In conclusion , financing poor Correct your spelling
build
countries
has multiple advantages as long as it is combined with non-financial support which is more practical , in order for both entities to maxmize
their benefits .Correct your spelling
maximise
Submitted by nouf.alkhalaifi2 on
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coherence
Your essay needs clearer topic sentences for each paragraph to strengthen the logical structure. This helps guide the reader through your argument.
coherence
Although your introduction and conclusion are present and relevant, the introduction could be more concise and directly related to the question asked.
cohesion
Some sentences are too long and can be broken down to improve readability. For improved cohesion, ensure each sentence clearly links to the next.
task response
Increase the depth of your examples to more clearly support the points you are making. Sometimes they are too general and lack specific details.
task response
You need to further develop your arguments to make your ideas more comprehensive. Some parts feel underdeveloped or repetitive.
task response
Ensure the essay fully addresses all parts of the task. Discuss more types of aid besides financial and provide more specific examples and explanations.
coherence
You have a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
task response
You have effectively addressed the task prompt and made your position clear.
task response
Relevant examples are used to support your main points, making your essay more convincing.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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