Many developed countries are giving financial aid to poor countries. However, this hasn’t solved the problem of poverty in these nations and so other types of help are needed. To what extent do you agree or disagree with the statement?

In
this
economic distress , Many of the developed
countries
had been funding the less fortunate
countries
.
This
subject
had
Wrong verb form
has
show examples
always been debatable in regards to the impact of solving the financial distress . In my opinion , I disagree with
this
notation and In
this
essay , I will
further
elaborate my view , in order to reach a logical conclusion.
Overall
, the primary reason for funding poor
countries
, is that it globally affects the economy , whether from the lender perspective or even the borrower . First and foremost , Giving funds will not only benefit the poor
countries
by the ability to develop the infrastructure and improve the country
,
Add the word(s)
, but
show examples
it will
also
help the developed
countries
to invest their retained earning by lending and getting an
intrest
Correct your spelling
interest
with high return because of the high risk involved by the lending process . It is essential
especially
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, especially
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with the high rates
in
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of
show examples
inflation that
causes
Correct subject-verb agreement
cause
show examples
a decrease in the money value over time .
For example
United States has made a loan to South Africa by issuing treasury bonds
this
led to a high rate
in
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of
show examples
return for the U.S. and
improves
Wrong verb form
improved
show examples
South Africa by gaining financial support to enable its schools .
Secondly
, as mentioned before
for
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apply
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the advantages
in
Change preposition
for
show examples
both the lender which is the developed country and the borrower
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
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is the poor country . There
is
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are
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some aspects to consider ,
while
financial funding is
madantory
Correct your spelling
mandatory
and beneficial , it must be aligned with other practical initiatives
such
as
transfering
Correct your spelling
transferring
experties
Correct your spelling
expertise
to support them in multiple things , whether for educational
puposes
Correct your spelling
purposes
such
as getting teachers to educate and guide the younger one's
,
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apply
show examples
or by having highly experienced engineers to help
bulid
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build
houses and among other buildings . In conclusion , financing poor
countries
has multiple advantages as long as it is combined with non-financial support which is more practical , in order for both entities to
maxmize
Correct your spelling
maximise
their benefits .
Submitted by nouf.alkhalaifi2 on

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coherence
Your essay needs clearer topic sentences for each paragraph to strengthen the logical structure. This helps guide the reader through your argument.
coherence
Although your introduction and conclusion are present and relevant, the introduction could be more concise and directly related to the question asked.
cohesion
Some sentences are too long and can be broken down to improve readability. For improved cohesion, ensure each sentence clearly links to the next.
task response
Increase the depth of your examples to more clearly support the points you are making. Sometimes they are too general and lack specific details.
task response
You need to further develop your arguments to make your ideas more comprehensive. Some parts feel underdeveloped or repetitive.
task response
Ensure the essay fully addresses all parts of the task. Discuss more types of aid besides financial and provide more specific examples and explanations.
coherence
You have a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
task response
You have effectively addressed the task prompt and made your position clear.
task response
Relevant examples are used to support your main points, making your essay more convincing.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • financial aid
  • development aid
  • sustainable development
  • economic growth
  • vocational training
  • poverty alleviation
  • infrastructure development
  • trade and investment
  • healthcare initiatives
  • technological transfers
  • corruption and governance
  • effective utilization
  • long-term solutions
  • economic disparity
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