The chart below gives information on the numbers of workers in different occupations who migrates to Australia between 2009 and 2012 Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant

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The chart illustrates how many migratory employees worked in different jobs in Australia from 2009 to 2012

Overall

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, there was a fluctuation in the number of workers who migrated to Australia in each given field of work. The figure for accounting jobs was always highest,

while

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the opposite was true for computer programmers. Migrants working in accounting started at 20,000, after which it experienced a significant rise to the highest point at 28,000 in 2010,

then

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fell to 22,000 and 21,000 in 2011 and 2012,respectively.

Initially

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, the percentage of the job of a computer programmer stood at 2,000, after which fluctuated to 4,000 in 2010, it returned to the beginning

then

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increased sharply by 3,000 in the

last

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year. 17,000 migratory employees worked in the cooking field in 2009, with subsequent fluctuation and a final decrease to 6,000.

Similarly

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, the proportion of a job in the software engineering field rose slowly to 19,000,20,000 and 21,000 in the first three years, respectively after which it decreased to 17,000 in 2012.

Submitted by tôi yêu ielts on Thu Jun 20 2024

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.

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Vocabulary: The word "decrease" was used 2 times.

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6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

169 words

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The chart below gives information on the numbers of workers in different occupations who migrates to Australia between 2009 and 2012 Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant

Some say you should always marry for love; others say that in an uncertain world it’s wiser to marry for money. Discuss both points of view and give your own opinion.

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