Some people think young people should be required to have full time education until they are at least 18 years old. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Issues related to
education
in adolescents are frequently discussed these days. It is argued that full-time time
education
is preferred for kids until they reach at least 18 years old. I partially agree with
this
assertion and
this
essay will provide
further
examples and explanations to support my viewpoint. On the one hand, there are a number of reasons why children should receive fundamental
education
. Not only a wide range of basic knowledge can be shared as initial guidance for their daily life, but
also
students will be taught to spend their time in school under restrictions.
Furthermore
, they can expand connections through the campus's extracurricular activities. When they become adult, both hard and soft skills will be the foundation for their future profession.
For instance
, individuals who study in primary school and
then
move to top-tier universities may have better opportunities to grow in their career paths than uneducated people.
Conversely
, conservative full-time training can lead to limitations for a student who has a strong passion for a particular area.
This
highlights that descendant can focus on their preferred leisure activities after school,
while
many hobbies
such
as sports, art , and music require a ton of hours to practice.
For example
, young generation footballers should be trained in specific soccer campuses since childhood to ensure that they will become the top among other players. All things considered, I am of the opinion that young people should focus on full-time
education
as a main priority.
However
, the government and academic institutions should find the right balance between required subjects and free time slots for exploring.
Submitted by nyentdn on

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task achievement
Your essay addresses the task well, providing a balanced view with both sides of the argument presented. Ensure that you provide more comprehensive and specific examples to support your points even further.
coherence cohesion
Make sure that each paragraph focuses on a single main idea. This will enhance the logical flow of your essay and make it easier for readers to follow your argument.
introduction conclusion present
The introduction and conclusion are clearly stated, which helps to frame the essay effectively.
logical structure
The essay is generally well-structured with a logical progression of ideas.
relevant specific examples
You provide relevant and specific examples to support your main points, which strengthens your argument.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • fundamental cornerstone
  • literacy and numeracy
  • social inequalities
  • foundation of knowledge
  • social mobility
  • informed and engaged citizenry
  • democratic processes
  • youth crime rates
  • productive activities
  • vocational training
  • workforce
  • stifling individual talent
  • economic contribution
  • stress and mental health issues
  • unsuitable educational system
  • one-size-fits-all approach
  • diverse talents
  • career paths
  • formal academic education
  • financial strains
  • low-income countries
  • improving quality of education
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