Some people think computer and internet are important in children’s study. But others think students can learn effectively in schools and with teachers. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Nowadays people prefer to teach their kids long time in
by
advanced technology devices like computers and laptops Change preposition
with
other
prefer Fix the agreement mistake
others
lets
their Change the verb form
to let
children
study in regular education
institutions which they
are more effective In my opinion. I think schools are the best choice for Correct pronoun usage
apply
children
to get their educations
.
Internet and advanced devices are more essential nowadays it Fix the agreement mistake
education
easy
to find any data or information Add a missing verb
is easy
instead
of spend
Wrong verb form
spending
Change the article
a
library
Correct article usage
a library
search
for that information , Wrong verb form
searching
However
internet is big
ocean of Add an article
a big
many
Correct word choice
apply
informations
Correct your spelling
information
children
may get lost or drawn without any supervision or professional educator
It may not or impossible to get good
quality Correct article usage
a good
of
Change preposition
apply
education
with internet
only .
Correct article usage
the internet
In
Change preposition
On
other
Correct article usage
the other
hands
traditional Fix the agreement mistake
hand
education
are
still the best Change the verb form
is
options
. Fix the agreement mistake
option
Childrens
get Correct your spelling
Children
any
data through professional teachers and Correct quantifier usage
apply
education
systems .Moreover
kids improve their social skills by learning with their peers , Add a comma
Moreover,
play
games and Wrong verb form
playing
socialize
which help kids in future to develop their abilities to make decisions about themselves in life and Wrong verb form
socialising
descoiver
what they Correct your spelling
discover
what
in future .
In conclusion, Correct your spelling
want
send
Wrong verb form
sending
children
to schools
to get their Fix the agreement mistake
school
education
by professional
Fix the agreement mistake
professionals
also
to improved
their social skills and make friends with their peers is much better than Change the form of the verb
improve
let's
Wrong verb form
letting
then
sit in front of computers for long hours without any supervision .Correct your spelling
them
Submitted by may.al.zemami on
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introduction
Your introduction should be clearer and more defined. It needs to better outline the two perspectives you're going to discuss.
structure
Your paragraphs need more clarity and structure. Each paragraph should focus on a single idea or argument.
development
You need to provide more specific examples to support your arguments. This helps in making your essay more convincing.
conclusion
Ensure your conclusion summarizes the main points effectively and clearly restates your opinion.
language use
Work on improving your grammar and punctuation. There are many minor errors that, when accumulated, affect readability.
task achievement
You have addressed both sides of the argument, fulfilling the task requirements.
clarity
Your opinion is clear and consistently stated throughout the essay.
structure
The basic structure of introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion is present.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.