It is important for everyone, including young people, to save money for their future. To what extend do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#people #money #future

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It is common knowledge that budgeting

money

expenses is of paramount significance for every individual, especially youngsters. Personally, I am in favour of

this

view to a large extent for two main reasons. It is highly essential for

people

to keep track of their spending

money

and try to save it for the future. To commence with,

people

, especially youngsters, have to be more careful with

money

in order to enhance their standards of living

subsequently

. To clarify, if individuals save their

money

in their bank account, they will have more

chance

Fix the agreement mistake

chances

show examples

to supply facilities and welfare,

such

as decent housing and luxury cars for their families in succession.

In other words

, the less they indulge in spending, the more they can provide facilities in the future.

Additionally

people

can invest their

money

in reliable stock companies in order to achieve a vast sum of

money

later. To specify, every person can make their little amount of

money

grow significantly by investing rather than spending

money

extravagantly. To exemplify, if a person had invested his

money

in land in Iran, his

money

would have immediately soared two or three times.

This

due to

the fact that considerable inflation in Iran leads to astronomical

surge

Fix the agreement mistake

surges

show examples

in prices.

Consequently

, in

this

country, the best way to make your future come to fruition is to invest your

money

in land.

On the other hand

, opponents assert that youngsters have to enjoy their lives because when they grow older, they will probably have neither time nor energy to take the most of their

money

For instance

, despite saving sufficient

money

, they assumedly do not have the chance to enjoy in travels.

This

is because they should look after their children or they may develop some diseases as they grow older and cannot be as energetic and vibrant.

However

people

can easily manage and tackle these issues by having enough

money

. In conclusion,

due to

the aforementioned reasons,

although

by budgeting

money

little can

people

enjoy themselves at older ages compared to youth, they can take advantage of several facilities and welfare.

Hence

, I am firmly convinced that saving

money

plays a pivotal role in every individual’s life.

Submitted by aradzandieh.dvm on Sat Jun 22 2024

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coherence cohesion

Ensure each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next for better flow and readability.

task achievement

Expand on the counter-argument to show a more balanced analysis.

coherence cohesion

Clear introduction and conclusion, making the essay well-structured.

task achievement

Good use of examples, like the investment in land in Iran, to support arguments.

12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

364 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

financial security
safety net
unforeseen circumstances
emergencies
future investments
retirement planning
financial discipline
habit of saving
amassing wealth
substantial fund
opportunity cost
additional income
inflation
purchasing power

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It is important for everyone, including young people, to save money for their future. To what extend do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Some people think that radio is the best way to get the news while others think that television is better for this purpose.

Large-scale festivals attract tourists, bring economic benefits to an area, while taking away the local culture. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages.

Doing an enjoyable activity with a child can develop better skill and more creative than reading to what extent do you agree or disagree use reason and specific example for to explain your answer.