Topic: It is common for young people to go abroad to study at university instead of studying in their home contry. Do the advantages of studying at university in another country outweigh the disadvantages?
Some
people
believe that most young people
prefer to go abroad to study at university instead
of studying in their home country. This
statement is an essential issue nowadays. It has positive and negative aspects . In this
essay, I will shed light on the advantages
and disadvantages of studying abroad at university.
On the one hand, many people
believe that studying abroad has several advantages
. The most important benefit is that
gain new knowledge and Change preposition
to
language
. For example
, students
gain a foreign language
when they go to the
foreign countries like Australia, Correct article usage
apply
United
States or Correct article usage
the United
United
Kingdom. Most Correct article usage
the United
of
foreign countries need Change preposition
apply
students
to communicate in English
Change the article
the English
language
. This
,the language
of students
will be improved in a good way to gain new knowledge and language
because they will communicate with foreign people
daily. Another advantage is being more independent. Studying abroad learn
most Verb problem
teaches
students
to be more independent of themselves rather when they are in their home country. They will know how to deal with others and how to cook for themselves . What is more, they will know how will fix any problems.
On the other hand
, there are some advantages
of studying abroad. The most significant is that life expensive
. Life abroad might be more expensive for Add a missing verb
is expensive
students
. Thus
, students
prefer to study in their home country because they do not have enough money to pay for living abroad. A second advantage is that different cultures. Most young people
can not live with different cultures because they feel more uncomfortable. What is more, they feel more difficult to deal with other culture's
.
In conclusion, it is fair to say that
studying abroad at Change noun form
cultures
university
for young Correct article usage
a university
students
indicate
more Correct subject-verb agreement
indicates
advantages
than disadvantages.Submitted by almeem on
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task achievement
You have a good structure and your essay covers both the advantages and disadvantages of studying abroad. However, you need to provide a more balanced discussion, addressing both sides equally to achieve a complete response. Currently, your essay leans more towards the advantages. Consider adding more detailed examples and explanations for the disadvantages.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has some logical progression; however, some points are not fully developed or clear. Ensure that each paragraph has a clear central idea, and use cohesive devices accurately to link your ideas. Avoid repetition and ensure each point is distinct.
general
Try to use varied sentence structures and a wider range of vocabulary to add more complexity to your essay. This will help in expressing your ideas more comprehensively. Moreover, pay attention to small grammatical issues, such as subject-verb agreement and article usage, to improve clarity.
task achievement
You have made a good attempt to discuss both the advantages and disadvantages of studying abroad. This shows your awareness of different perspectives on the issue.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are present and help frame your essay well. This creates a clear start and end to your argument which helps in understanding your main points.
task achievement
Including personal development points like gaining language skills and independence is a good approach, as these are compelling reasons that support studying abroad.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
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