Some people believe that in a city, the best way to travel is by car, while other people argue that bicycles are a better way of travelling in a city

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Some individuals consider motor vehicles more convenient to go around in a city
however
, others trust bicycles to make it more suitable to travel in a place surrounding their residents. My concerns on
this
are simple I believe both ways have their own benefits which I am going to explain in upcoming paragraphs. Travelling by car makes it easy for mankind to save time and energy.It consumes less time and power to go anywhere in their hometown because it covers thousands of miles within an hour or less than that which assists a person in finishing their tasks in a few hours.
Moreover
, it provides humans ample security and privacy which leads to an enjoyable moment
while
they are on a trip with their loved ones.
For instance
,cars are kind of personal vehicles that have a roof on them which
make
Correct subject-verb agreement
makes
show examples
them unworried about the bad weather and they can spend precious time with their families without any hesitations. In the case of physical rides like bicycles, it has its own positive effects on the lives of human beings.The main advantage is it helps them to maintain their fitness balance. As an example, people who
travels
Change the verb form
travel
show examples
on bicycles spend more of their body energy on it to make it run which makes them more sweating
while
they are on these rides which leads to a healthy lifestyle.
Additionally
, it offers them a chance to save
their
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
money in both ways like they have been staying healthy and do not need to go to the doctor or they could save their fuel consumption that
compulsory
Add a missing verb
is compulsory
show examples
for motor vehicles. In conclusion , I would like to say both ideas are beneficial for people to travel around their areas but there is a proper balance between the two trends because they should consider or choose
according to
their needs
while
in bad weather they should use cars
otherwise
motorcycles are the best option.
Submitted by kaurbhagwant95 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
The essay would benefit from a clearer thesis statement in the introduction to clearly present your stance on the topic.
task achievement
Be sure to avoid generalizations and provide more specific examples to support your points.
coherence cohesion
Improve the logical flow between paragraphs for better coherence. Use more linking words and phrases to guide the reader through your arguments.
coherence cohesion
Enhance your conclusion by summarizing the key points discussed in the essay and re-emphasizing your stance.
task achievement
You addressed both perspectives on the topic, which shows a balanced approach.
coherence cohesion
The essay contains a clear introduction and conclusion, making it easy to follow the main points.
coherence cohesion
You have used a variety of sentence structures, which shows your range in written English.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • congestion
  • pollution
  • maintenance
  • eco-friendly
  • infrastructure
  • physical health
  • suitable
  • weather conditions
  • traffic
  • repair costs
  • cycling infrastructure
  • fuel costs
  • carrying heavy loads
  • physical limitations
What to do next:
Look at other essays: