Many things that used to be done in the home by hands are now being done by machines. Does this development bring more advantages or disadvantages?
One of the most conspicuous trends of today's world is an ongoing debate among people about working manually or using
machines
. While
some people prefer getting the work
done by hand, in my view, the use of machinery offers more advantages, as explained below in this
essay.
the first advantage of this
development is time-saving. To explain, many activities take a long time to be accomplished because it
Correct pronoun usage
they
requires
both physical and mental inputs and sometimes Correct subject-verb agreement
require
also
need more manpower. For example
, a room can be cleaned by a vacuum cleaner in 5 minutes, while
doing this
on your own takes 30 minutes. Therefore
, these appliances restrain time. Secondly
, it gives freedom to women. Since ladies mostly look after their home chores, these devices help them out a lot and grant them more independence.
Granted, the hand-made work
still offers a personal touch, be it for product creation or a service offering. However
, not every product or service can be delivered personally, especially high-demand products that are frequently consumed. Moreover
, it will take a long time to complete a job without the aid of machinery. Hence
the need for machines
to automate the process is even more necessary.
In conclusion, every individual has the option to do work
on their own or make use of the automated tools available. The above discourse discussed the pros and cons of doing work
via hands and the usage of machines
. The reasons given above certainly affirm the advantages of letting machines
take over the housework.Submitted by makemoneyizzy16 on
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task response
Your essay is clear and answers the question effectively. However, ensuring precise language and proper capitalization, especially at the beginning of sentences, will enhance readability. For example, start the second paragraph with 'The' instead of 'the'.
coherence and cohesion
Add transitions between ideas to improve the flow and make your argumentation more cohesive. Consider phrases like 'In addition to these benefits' or 'Moreover' to link your points more smoothly.
coherence and cohesion
You have a well-structured essay with a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps in presenting your ideas logically.
task response
The examples provided, such as the use of a vacuum cleaner, effectively support your main points and make your argumentation more concrete.
task response
The essay demonstrates a comprehensive understanding of the essay topic and presents clear ideas and relevant examples.