IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The pie charts show the spending habits of citizens in UK in 1971 and 2001. Write a report to a university lecturer describing the data.

The pie charts show the spending habits of citizens in UK in 1971 and 2001. Write a report to a university lecturer describing the data.
The pie charts
describes
Change the verb form
describe
show examples
 on spending habits of people in
UK
Correct article usage
the UK
show examples
 between 1971 and 2001.
Overall
Linking Words
, it is readily visible that the waste
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
habits of
British
Correct article usage
the British
show examples
 significantly changed during the period.
Also
Linking Words
 in both
Fix the agreement mistake
terms
show examples
term
Add a comma
term,
show examples
 they had habits mostly from cars and
foods
Fix the agreement mistake
food
show examples
,
while
Linking Words
amount
Add an article
the amount
show examples
 spent on computers increased in the UK. In 1971 British spent 44% on food which was the highest percentage among the cost categories.The second highest spending in 1971 was on cars, which constituted 22% of all costs. The lowest is on computers only 2%
however
Linking Words
, in 2001
computers
Fix the agreement mistake
computer
show examples
 users
increase
Wrong verb form
increased
show examples
 to 12%,
it
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
 means that
time
Correct article usage
the time
show examples
 period depended on it. Furniture during 2
period
Change to a plural noun
periods
show examples
 not even changed. The second pie
charts
Fix the agreement mistake
chart
show examples
 illustrates
expense
Correct article usage
the expense
show examples
 of
portion
Add an article
a portion
show examples
 of people declined from 6% to 1%,
while
Linking Words
 restaurants
to accelerate
Change the verb form
accelerated
show examples
 2 times
mors
Correct your spelling
more
 than
1971
Change preposition
in 1971
show examples
.The highest amount spent in 2001 by the British was on cars and that consisted
almost
Change preposition
of almost
show examples
 half of the total expenses in
Linking Words
this
Correct determiner usage
that
show examples
 year.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Vocabulary: The word "charts" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "changed" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
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