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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Academic The graph below shows the average monthly change in the prices of three metals during 2014. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparision where relevant.

Academic The graph below shows the average monthly change in the prices of three metals during 2014. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparision where relevant.
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The line chart illustrates a comparison in monthly changing
price
Fix the agreement mistake
prices
show examples
 between
Nickel
Use synonyms
 ,Copper and Zinc in 2014
,.
Change the punctuation
,
.
show examples
 The data are
museared
Correct your spelling
mustard
 in percentages.
overall
Linking Words
 , all metals
experianced
Correct your spelling
experienced
 a
downwared
Correct your spelling
downward
 trend during the first months.
Linking Words
in
Capitalize word
In
show examples
 addition , they all rose
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the
lastes
Correct your spelling
last
 months
on
Change preposition
of
show examples
 the year. The most
sgnificant
Correct your spelling
significant
chang
Correct your spelling
change
show examples
 can be seen in
Nickel
Use synonyms
. on the one hand,
Nickel
Use synonyms
showes
Correct your spelling
showed
 a
charp
Correct your spelling
sharp
 decline to 1% in March and stayed
stabel
Correct your spelling
stable
next
Correct article usage
the next
show examples
 month.
However
Linking Words
 , the rate go
downe dramaticly
Correct your spelling
down dramatically
 and
reach
Wrong verb form
reached
show examples
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 low point
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
june
Change the capitalization
June
show examples
 at -3%.
then
Linking Words
 it
go
Change the verb form
goes
show examples
 up again and
reminde
Correct your spelling
remained
 steady next three months at -1%.
In
Linking Words
addition
Add a comma
addition,
show examples
 the figure rose to 2% in November and December.
on the other hand
Linking Words
, the initial percentage of
Nickel
Use synonyms
 is 2% . It rose to 3% before
decline
Wrong verb form
declining
show examples
gradualy
Correct your spelling
gradually
 to -1% in
june
Change the capitalization
June
show examples
.
Whereas
Linking Words
, the percentage stayed stable at around -0.5% before
go
Wrong verb form
going
show examples
 up and exceeding other metals and being the higher
at the end
Linking Words
 of the period. With
regareds
Correct your spelling
regard
 to
Copper
Add a comma
Copper,
show examples
 it fluctuated between 2% and -1% throughout the given year.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "in addition".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words nickel with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentages" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "decline" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "go up" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "stayed" was used 2 times.
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