In recent years sports stars have become increasingly famous and wealthy. For some this is a benefit, raising the profile of sports, but for others, it is a negative influence. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
In recent years,
sports
stars
have become more famous and richer. Some people think this
is good because it makes sports
more popular. Others believe it has a negative impact. This
essay will discuss both views and give my opinion.
On one hand, the increased fame and wealth of sports
stars
have many benefits. Famous athletes
can inspire young people to participate in sports
and stay healthy. Their visibility attracts more media attention, sponsorships, and money, which can improve sports
facilities and training programs. For example
, football stars
like Lionel Messi and Cristiano Ronaldo have made football more popular worldwide, leading to more youth programs. Additionally
, successful athletes
often use their influence to support important causes and drive positive change in society.
On the other hand
, excessive fame and wealth can have negative effects. The pressure to maintain their status can lead athletes
to prioritize personal gain over the sport itself. This
can result in unethical behavior
, Change the spelling
behaviour
such
as using drugs to enhance performance, which damages the sport's reputation. Furthermore
, the lavish lifestyles of wealthy athletes
can set unrealistic expectations for young fans, making them value money over hard work and teamwork. The focus on individual stars
can also
overshadow the importance of collaboration in sports
.
In conclusion, while
the fame and wealth of sports
stars
can make sports
more popular and inspire people, it
can Correct pronoun usage
they
also
lead to unethical behavior
and misplaced values. In my opinion, the benefits can outweigh the drawbacks if Change the spelling
behaviour
athletes
and sports
organizations emphasize honesty, teamwork, and the true spirit of competition.Submitted by vladislavikonnikov112 on
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task achievement
To achieve a higher score, provide more specific examples or expand on the examples provided to support your points more robustly. This will help deepen your argument and illustrate your points more vividly.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph is clearly linked to the next, making the flow of the essay even smoother. Try using a wider range of cohesive devices to connect ideas, which will enhance the readability of the essay.
coherence cohesion
Adding counterarguments or addressing potential objections can help demonstrate critical thinking and balance. For example, you could discuss how some athletes manage to stay grounded despite their wealth and fame, and how this can serve as a positive model.
task achievement
The essay topic is clearly addressed, and both views on the issue are discussed thoroughly. This shows a comprehensive understanding of the task.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are effectively used to frame the discussion and clarify the overall argument. This gives the essay a strong structure.
coherence cohesion
The main points are logically organized, and the essay flows well from one idea to the next, maintaining a coherent structure.