It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages?
Thesedays
, a lot of people often encounter threats and challenging moments in both Correct your spelling
These days
professional
and personal lives. Correct pronoun usage
their professional
However
, i
believe that it is seen as beneficial affects to individuals, as they can develop their abilities in Change the capitalization
I
those field
. Change the determiner
that field
those fields
This
essay will discuss the benefits of the risks
with examples.
When it comes to enduring hard tasks in younger generation, they
often Correct pronoun usage
apply
undergo
tough Correct subject-verb agreement
undergoes
period
in Fix the agreement mistake
periods
ther
ordinary lives Correct your spelling
their
the
due to
the lacks
of life Fix the agreement mistake
lack
exprience
and Correct your spelling
experience
knowledges
. They Change the wording
knowledge
pieces of knowledge
bits of knowledge
migh
not fully comprehend Correct your spelling
might
the
moral values, leading them to encounter various challenging moments and failures. Correct article usage
apply
However
, this
situations exert an extremely Change the determiner
these
postive
influence on their developmental stages. Correct your spelling
positive
Hence
, children should be given the choice oppurtunities
themselves, By doing so, they may learn about making-decision process effectively, helping Correct your spelling
opportunities
to
their development. Change preposition
apply
As a result
, the more challenging period they have, the more oppurtunities
they get .
Correct your spelling
opportunities
Moreover
, risks
often encourage workers to continous
Correct your spelling
continue
works
and challenges in Fix the agreement mistake
work
ther
workplace. There Correct your spelling
the
their
are
nobody who did well at the first steps. Change the verb form
is
Therefore
if they accept various risks
, they will get a feeling of motivation, leading them devote
a significant amount of time and effort to Add the particle
to devote
works
. Wrong verb form
work
For instance
, i
Change the capitalization
I
estabilished
Correct your spelling
established
design
studio in the previous year. During managing my studio, we came into collaboration with Correct article usage
a design
big
Correct article usage
a big
design
company over desiging
and producing the chairs. It is Correct your spelling
designing
significant
and burdensome project for our small Add an article
a significant
the significant
design
studio. Throughout lengthy
and demanding Add an article
the lengthy
design
process, we often faced challenging
and Replace the word
challenges
risks
, but we got over this
hard project. After that
Add a comma
that,
i
can develop Change the capitalization
I
positive
Correct article usage
a positive
mind-set
to Correct your spelling
mindset
takle
any difficult tasks during tough times. Correct your spelling
tackle
take
Therefore
, taking hrad
moments Correct your spelling
hard
help
to Correct subject-verb agreement
helps
develope
Correct your spelling
develop
capacity
of my Correct article usage
the capacity
design
skills.
In conclusion, taking risks
play
Correct subject-verb agreement
plays
an
crucial role in development of the abilities and mental. A lot of experience Change the article
a
of
Change preposition
with
risks
makes it easier for them to handle challenging circumstances.Submitted by dksrlgus1017 on
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Grammar
Ensure correct subject-verb agreement and more accurate use of articles (e.g., 'beneficial affects' should be 'beneficial effects').
Ideas development
Expand and elaborate on certain points for better support and clarity. For example, explaining exactly how overcoming challenges in childhood translates into long-term benefits.
Grammar
Use consistent and proper capitalization (‘i’ should be ‘I’).
Examples
The essay contains relevant examples that illustrate the main points, making the argument more persuasive.
Structure
The essay demonstrates a clear structure with a sensible progression of ideas.
Conclusion
The conclusion effectively summarizes the main arguments while reinforcing the overall position.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example