Some people say the main way to be happy in the life is to have a lot of money. How might having a lot of money make people happy? What other things in life can make people happy?

Part of
people
believe that a
lot
of
money
brings happiness in
life
because it can provide luxurious
life
to
individuals
with high status in society.
Nevertheless
, having a self-satisfactory attitude and being grateful in every situation can really have a positive impact on
people
's lives. 
 There is no doubt that
people
really get excited with a
lot
of
money
because they can live expensive lives
such
as they can buy high-rated brands, multiple cars, big mansion house.
Therefore
, all these things offer them comfort more than enough and they feel like a King or Queen.
Moreover
,
people
with a
lot
of
money
also
uplift their status in society because others start to give them respect after watching their luxurious lifestyle. Others respect them so that they can get help from rich
people
someday.
That is
why, they always try to please
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
wealthy
people
. Eventually, wealthy
individuals
get a
lot
of attention from others. 

However
, a feeling of self-satisfaction can make
people
happy. All they have to accept the fact that everyone on
this
earth is unique and every individual has a different destiny, talent and way of living. So, all they have to do is be glad where they are right now, rather than comparing themselves with rich
individuals
.
Moreover
,
people
can make their lives even more cheerful with gratitude. If
individuals
start being grateful for every small thing in their
life
like food, shelter, good health, family and many more, they
would
Wrong verb form
will
show examples
realise that they are living the best
life
.
For instance
, I personally start my day with a prayer to God I thank God for everything.
This
particular prayer really uplifts my mood and I feel happy all day alone. 
 In conclusion, there is no denying that
money
can give
people
materialistic happiness in
life
, but having a positive attitude and being thankful for small things can make
people
fulfil from the inside, which
in other words
is called "inner happiness".
Submitted by ksamandeep03 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

comprehensive ideas
To raise your responses to a higher level, expand on your current points with further detailed examples. Additionally, tying your conclusion to the main points presented more explicitly can make your argument more clear and compelling.
language accuracy
Be mindful of minor grammatical errors and awkward phrasing. For example, use "high-end brands" instead of "high-rated brands" and "big mansion" instead of "big mansion house". Review your work for these types of small errors that can detract from clarity.
task response
You successfully present a clear and coherent response to both parts of the question, which directly addresses the task at hand.
structure
Your essay has a logical structure with clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. Each idea flows smoothly into the next, aiding readability and comprehension.
examples and support
You make good use of supporting details and examples, such as your personal experience with gratitude, to illustrate your points and bring them to life.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

You are not ready for IELTS Speaking, if you

  • Can’t speak smoothly without pauses.
  • Use simple words and lack vocabulary.
  • Feel nervous and anxious when speaking.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Financial security
  • Basic needs
  • Comfort
  • Luxury
  • Freedom
  • Altruistic
  • Philanthropy
  • Nurturing relationships
  • Fulfillment
  • Sense of accomplishment
  • Physical well-being
  • Spiritual beliefs
  • Community involvement
  • Gratitude
  • Mindfulness
  • Simple pleasures
What to do next:
Look at other essays:

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!