Many parents encourage young people to leave home when they age, while others think they should stay home with family. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

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Most

parents

Use synonyms

believe that young people should move out when they grow up,

while

Linking Words

others think they have to stay with their family. I can say that young people must leave home when they age On the one hand,

young

Correct article usage

the young

show examples

community prefer to stay with their friends during their university years.

Additionally

Linking Words

, they enjoy having a party with their groupmates at home

therefore

Linking Words

renting a new house is the best way to experience university life.

For instance

Linking Words

, in America and other developed countries,

parents

Use synonyms

try to release their children at 18 ages and they contemplate independence as so

importarıt

Correct your spelling

important

after

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

age

On the other

Linking Words

hand

Add a comma

hand,

show examples

some

parents

Use synonyms

want their children to stay with them even when they age in

this

Linking Words

situation, these children get used to their

parents

Use synonyms

and they can suffer in their relationship with their spouse when they get married notably, staying with their mother can create problems in marriage

To conclude

Linking Words

, I think that

young

Correct article usage

the young

show examples

population should decide themselves to stay with family or leave home

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

if they do they can find the right pace in their decision

Submitted by raufpasayev83 on Mon Jul 08 2024

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task achievement

Provide more relevant specific examples and clarify your ideas with comprehensive points.

coherence cohesion

Improve the logical structure by using more transitional phrases to guide the reader through your arguments smoothly.

coherence cohesion

The essay contains an introduction and conclusion, which is essential for a well-structured essay.

task achievement

The main points are supported, although more relevant examples are needed for a higher score.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5

5.5

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

5.5

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.5

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

5.5

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

182 words

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Many parents encourage young people to leave home when they age, while others think they should stay home with family. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

News editor decide what to to broadcast on television and what to print in newspaper. What factors do you think influence these decisions? Do we bacame used to bad news? Would it be better if more good news was reported?

some people argue that spending a lot on celebrations, such as weddings or birthdays, is a waste of money. Others think it is important for people and society. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

In same cities, governments have tried to reduce traffic. For instance, they impose tax during rush hour. Do you think this development is positive or negative?

Many people nowadays spend a large part of their free time using a smartphone. What do you think are the reasons for this? Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

Many people nowadays spend a large part of their free time using a smartphone. What do you think are the reasons for this? Do you think this is a positive or negative development?