After graduating from high school, some young people decide to start working right away instead of going to university. What are the advantages and disadvantages for young people who decide to do this?

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It has been evidently seen that most youngsters prefer to start working immediately after finishing secondary
school
without going through a tertiary education. There are pros and cons to
this
which I will be discussing in
this
essay.
Firstly
, one main advantage young people have when they decide to start earning money right after graduating from high
school
instead
of furthering
education
Correct pronoun usage
their education
show examples
is that they gain more working experience
as well as
have financial stability over the years compared to their colleagues
that
Correct pronoun usage
who
show examples
ventured into university and spent more time studying.
This
can be attributed to the fact that most of the
juvenile
Fix the agreement mistake
juveniles
show examples
dive into business or skill acquisition and become entrepreneurs
hence
making profits and earnings in
active
Add an article
the active
an active
show examples
stage of their lives.
For example
, from
history
Add a comma
history,
show examples
the south-eastern youths in Nigeria are known to be the wealthiest in the country.
This
is because their male youths go into apprenticeship immediately after basic or secondary
school
where they gain enough skills and afterwards start up their own business
hence
become
Wrong verb form
becoming
show examples
successful as youths.
In contrast
, it is imperative to note the possible disadvantages associated with not obtaining a university degree which is mainly a limitation to certain career
choice
Fix the agreement mistake
choices
show examples
and growth.
That is
, one with only an O-level certificate cannot take up certain professions like lawyer, doctor etc and cannot be promoted to more than certain levels at their workplace notwithstanding the number of years of working experience.
For example
, bankers in
west
Capitalize word
West
show examples
Africa can begin with only WAEC (West African Examination Certificate) but can only grow
further
in the finance sector by furthering their education to obtain
BA
Correct article usage
a BA
show examples
or MBA.
This
is to be fair to those
that
Correct pronoun usage
who
show examples
acquired degrees and supposedly have more intellectual knowledge
hence
placing more value on
university
Correct article usage
a university
show examples
degree over
wide
Add an article
a wide
show examples
range of experience. In conclusion, many young people prefer to work after high
school
without going to college but there are pros and cons to
this
and should be properly considered before
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task achievement
The essay responds well to the task, but the conclusion is incomplete. Make sure to summarize your points clearly at the end.
coherence cohesion
Improve the logical flow between paragraphs and within paragraphs by using more transitional phrases. This will help the reader follow your argument more easily.
task achievement
Ensure all your ideas are fully developed. Sometimes, the points are touched upon but not thoroughly explained.
coherence cohesion
Try to maintain a clear structure throughout your essay, with distinct paragraphs for each main idea. This will enhance the readability.
task achievement
You have provided relevant examples to support your points, which strengthen your arguments.
task achievement
Your essay addresses the advantages and disadvantages as required by the task.
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