Some universities now offer their courses on the Internet so that people can study online. Is this a positive or negative development?
It is a common phenomenon that
people
can study
university
courses
online nowadays. It causes a considerable debate. However
in my opinion, studying Add a comma
However,
university
courses
online is a positive development.
There is no doubt that studying university
courses
online has some negative influences. For instance, universities can not ensure education qualities
, because they lack the method to supervise the Fix the agreement mistake
quality
students
’ learning. Furthermore
, teachers can not respond to students
’ questions and alter teaching approaches quickly, thanks to the network delay and the huge number of online students
. Whereas
the advantages of studying university
courses
online are more than its
disadvantages in a long-viewed.
On the one hand, Correct pronoun usage
their
study
college Wrong verb form
studying
courses
online will provide more opportunities for ordinary people
to accept education, such
as someone who lives in a remote area without a complete transportation system. Plus, online lessons will decrease their consumption of study
, which means people
can study
more different subjects within their original budget. Therefore
, we can expect that online lessons will promote the citizens' education level in a short time. On the other hand
, it is convenient for university
students
to study
, wherever they are. For instance
, students
can leave their campus to take part in filed
trips overseas and keep up with Correct your spelling
field
courses
at the same time through studying universities
Change the noun form
university
courses
online. Consequently
, the colleges’ online lessons can offer the chance for students
to arrange the study
scheme by themselves.
In conclusion, it seems to me that universities providing their courses
on the internet
have a lot of benefits for Capitalize word
Internet
people
and will have positive development.Submitted by fiasngs on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
task achievement
While you provide a clear stance and support for it, there are some minor grammatical issues. For example, in the phrase 'thanks to the network delay,' 'thanks to' is positive whereas a phrase like 'because of' or 'due to' could fit better.
task achievement
Ensure all examples used are specific and relevant. For instance, the sentence 'students can leave their campus to take part in filed trips overseas' can confuse some readers. A concrete example would make this point stronger.
coherence cohesion
Some sentences can be better connected to enhance the flow of the essay. Transitional phrases like 'Additionally' or 'Moreover' can help in making the paragraph smoother.
task achievement
Your stance is clear, and you have given thoughtful reasons for why you believe that online courses are a positive development.
coherence cohesion
You have a clear introduction and conclusion, which frame your essay nicely and make it easier to follow.
coherence cohesion
Your points are generally well-supported, and you've covered both advantages and disadvantages before concluding with a firm stance.
Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.
‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.
Examples:
I really want to study but I’m too tired.
I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.
If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!