IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian coountries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040.

The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian coountries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040.
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The line chart depicts the change in the proportion of citizens with different nationalities, being
Philippinos
Correct your spelling
Filipinos
, Malaysians, Thais, and
Indonesian
Replace the word
Indonesians
show examples
, living in cities from the year
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
1970 to 2020 and the projection of
population
Use synonyms
 from 2020 to 2040.
Overall
Linking Words
, all nationalities increased in proportion from 1970 to 2040, with
Philippinos
Correct your spelling
Philippines
 being the major
population
Use synonyms
. From the year from 1970 to 2020, the percentage of Malaysians rose drastically from one-third of the
population
Use synonyms
 in 1970 to over
two-third
Correct your spelling
two-thirds
show examples
 of the
population
Use synonyms
 in 2020.
While
Linking Words
 Philipinos rose
sginificantly
Correct your spelling
significantly
 from one-third of the
population
Use synonyms
 in 1970 to almost half of the
population
Use synonyms
, shortly replaced
Malaysian
Replace the word
Malaysia
show examples
 as the most populated
nations
Fix the agreement mistake
nation
show examples
 in the cities. It
then
Linking Words
 suffered a drop to nearly 40% of the
population
Use synonyms
 in 2020. Other nationalities,
such
Linking Words
 as Thais and Indonesian
also
Linking Words
 witnessed an increase from below
one-fifith
Correct your spelling
one-fifth
 of the
population
Use synonyms
 in 1970 to over one-third of the
population
Use synonyms
. In the projected
population
Use synonyms
 demographic from 2020 to 2040, the percentage of
Malaysian
Fix the agreement mistake
Malaysians
show examples
 is expected to rise continuously but
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
 a slower rate to nearly 80% of the
poulation
Correct your spelling
population
. The rest of the nations have
rougly
Correct your spelling
roughly
 half of the total
population
Use synonyms
 living in the cities.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Vocabulary: Replace the words population with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "nearly" was used 2 times.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • urbanization
  • population
  • percentage
  • trend
  • growth
  • stagnation
  • prediction
  • projection
  • rapid
  • gradual
  • significant
  • factors
What to do next:
Look at other essays: