Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities. Others, however, say that this would have little effect on public health and that other measures are required. Discussion both these views and give your own opinions.
Some believe in promoting sports amenities to enhance
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overall
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the overall
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health of
individual
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individuals
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.
while
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,
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apply
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others argue that it would have negative impacts on the other measurable factors of health.I partially agree with these statements and discuss
it
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them
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in
this
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essay.
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such
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a
facilities
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facility
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like
sport
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a sport
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club,huge ground one can use it for their leisure time activity like clubbing and playing with their friends.
jenny.15121996
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task achievement
The introduction needs to clearly and completely state the main points you will discuss. Try to concisely address both views and state your opinion clearly. For example: 'Some people believe that increasing the number of sports facilities is the best way to improve public health. Others argue that this approach is insufficient and other measures are needed. This essay will discuss both viewpoints and provide my own perspective.'
clear comprehensive ideas
Your ideas are not fully developed. Try to expand on why sports facilities improve public health and why some believe they are insufficient. For example, you could discuss how sports facilities promote physical activity, which is essential for maintaining a healthy weight and reducing the risk of chronic diseases. On the other hand, you could discuss that other measures such as education about nutrition and healthcare accessibility are also necessary for a holistic approach to public health.
relevant specific examples
Provide specific examples to support your points. For example, mention a city that has successfully improved public health by increasing sports facilities or how educational programs on nutrition have had a positive impact.
logical structure
The essay should follow a logical structure. Make sure your paragraphs have clear topic sentences and that the ideas flow smoothly from one to the next. Use transition phrases like 'Firstly,' 'In addition,' 'On the other hand,' and 'In conclusion' to guide the reader.
introduction/conclusion present
Include a proper conclusion to summarize your points and restate your opinion. For example: 'In conclusion, while increasing the number of sports facilities can play a role in improving public health, it is also important to implement other measures such as public health education and improving access to medical care.'
logical structure
Connect the ideas within and between paragraphs effectively using cohesive devices. For example, 'Furthermore,' 'However,' 'In contrast,' etc.
task achievement
The essay addresses the task by discussing both views about public health.
task achievement
The topic is relevant and important for public health discussions.
Include an introduction and conclusion
A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.
The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.
The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:
Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation
Example:
To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported.After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.
Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:
In general, sports are introduced to keep everyone healthy and it also involves some cultural traditions. There are certain dangerous sports and some think this should be banned and others believe it is people's choice. In my opinion, I would say we should not ban any games as each one has its plus and minus.
In today's modernised world, people have access to numerous pieces of information and the positive impacts of physical fitness is no exception. Albeit knowing its significance, individuals still struggle with engaging in regular forms of exercise mainly because of time constraints and health limitations. I believe this trend could change if people are able to create a work-life balance and hire personal fitness instructors.
An increasing number of people in certain countries are curious about the history of the home or construction they reside in. It appears due to their curiosity and a sense of connection and belonging between the building and the residents. To get familiar with the background of their accommodation, people can find relevant information by searching online, visiting historical local museums, or even asking former residents there.
These days, through the science and technology developed, there are all kinds of social media. People can use these tools talk about music with different people who come from different backgrounds. This trend is popular and common all over the world.In my opinion, I agree with this point.