IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7

Topic : Some people think that environmental problems are too big for individuals to solve. Others believe that individuals also can do some things to solve these problems. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#topic #people #individuals
The escalating environmental challenges facing our world today have sparked an ongoing debate on whether individual efforts can significantly impact these
issues
. Some argue that the scope and complexity of environmental
problems
 are too vast for individuals to address effectively,
while
 others believe that individual actions are crucial in the broader context of environmental sustainability. Those who contend that environmental
problems
 are too large for individuals to solve emphasize the global scale and systemic nature of these
issues
.
Problems
such
 as climate change, deforestation, and ocean pollution are driven by large-scale industrial activities, multinational corporations, and complex
socio-economic
Correct your spelling
socioeconomic
show examples
 systems.
For instance
, carbon emissions from large factories and deforestation for agriculture are
problems
 that require coordinated international policies and corporate responsibility. From
this
 viewpoint, individual actions like recycling or using public transport, though commendable, seem insignificant compared to the magnitude of the
issues
 at hand.
However
, proponents of individual action argue that personal efforts, when aggregated, can lead to significant environmental benefits. Small changes in daily
behavior
Change the spelling
behaviour
show examples
,
such
 as reducing energy consumption, minimizing waste, and supporting sustainable products, collectively contribute to a substantial reduction in environmental impact.
Moreover
, individuals can drive change through advocacy and by influencing market trends.
For example
, the increasing demand for eco-friendly products has led companies to adopt greener practices.
Additionally
, grassroots movements have historically played a pivotal role in shaping environmental policies and raising public awareness about sustainability
issues
. In my opinion,
while
 systemic changes are undeniably essential for addressing large-scale environmental
problems
, the importance of individual actions should not be underestimated. Personal responsibility and lifestyle changes are critical in creating a culture of sustainability. Individual efforts not only reduce one's environmental footprint but
also
 serve as a catalyst for broader societal change.
Therefore
, a balanced approach that combines individual responsibility with systemic reforms is essential for achieving sustainable solutions to our environmental challenges.
Submitted by ru.kabiru.biru on

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task achievement
To improve further, consider including more specific and varied examples to illustrate your points, especially in the paragraph discussing individual actions. This will make your arguments even more convincing.
coherence cohesion
You may refine the balance between body paragraphs to ensure both sides of the argument are equally developed. Currently, the paragraph supporting individual actions feels slightly more detailed.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear and logical structure with a strong introduction and conclusion that frames the argument well.
coherence cohesion
The main points are thoroughly supported, and the essay effectively discusses both views on the topic.
task achievement
The response is comprehensive and clearly addresses the task, providing a balanced discussion and a well-reasoned personal opinion.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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