Extreme sports such as skydiving and skiing are very dangerous and should be banned. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this view?

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Some
people
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believe that extreme
sports
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,
such
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as skydiving
of
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or
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skiing, are too dangerous and should be prohibited. I completely disagree with
this
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statement
,
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apply
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and believe that anyone in the world must have access to these
sports
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in their lives. One of the major reasons why there are so many opinions that extreme
sports
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must be banned is the fact that
the
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apply
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extraordinary
sports
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are attracting more and more
people
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and rising their popularity.
Similarly
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, their fame
is strongly increases
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strongly increases
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, which leads to more public outrage
due to
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the false opinion that the more participants, the more negative cases occur.
For instance
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, in France, the ski competition was
canceled
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cancelled
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due to
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illegal protests in
favor
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favour
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of banning
this
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sport.
In addition
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to false opinions, the opinion on the ban is supported by supporters of classical
sports
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,
such
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as football and biathlon.
Therefore
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, they believe that the new extreme
sports
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will attract a large number of fans, which is why support for classic
sports
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will decrease significantly. And in turn,
this
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will lead to a decrease in funding for large-scale competitions.
Furthermore
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,
this
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also
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means that
people
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will faced with the problem:
to take
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of taking
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a chance or not
?
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.
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In contrast
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, young, athletic, and ambitious
people
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are more likely to choose an extreme sport than a classic one.
However
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,
this
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is
due to
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the fact that they have less fear and more need to get adrenaline. In conclusion, it is apparent that some
people
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believe that society must ban dangerous kinds of sport. In my view, some
people
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should immerse themselves in these exciting
sports
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better, because if you follow all precautions, everything will be fine.
Submitted by eparfenenkov on

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task achievement
Expand your introduction to provide clearer context and background for your argument on extreme sports.
coherence cohesion
Improve paragraph transitions to make the essay flow more smoothly.
task achievement
Provide more specific examples and evidence to support your points, making your argument more persuasive.
coherence cohesion
Clarify the connection between ideas and arguments to enhance the logical structure of your essay.
task achievement
You have successfully provided a clear opinion and addressed the task prompt directly in your essay introduction and conclusion.
task achievement
Your essay covers multiple perspectives on the issue, providing a well-rounded discussion.
coherence cohesion
You concluded your essay effectively, reinforcing your stance on the topic.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Extreme sports
  • Dangerous
  • Banned
  • Agree
  • Disagree
  • View
  • Definition
  • Popularity
  • Advantages
  • Disadvantages
  • Dangers
  • Personal choice
  • Responsibility
  • Balancing
  • Risks
  • Benefits
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